My Green Eyed Monster
by Aki Rei
Summary: Ever wondered what Sanzo would be like when he's jealous? Well let's just say that there's a green eyed monster lurking somewhere in him. SG
1. Default Chapter

My Green-Eyed Monster  
  
PROLOGUE  
  
Sanzo's POV  
  
He is so perfect. With his lithe tanned body, with his sweat glistening in his skin and the passionate look in the depth of his eyes, I can't help but moan. Especially now that his hands slid down beneath my robes caressing my chest as he did so.  
  
Involuntarily I shiver under his touch cuing that I wanted more. Smirking, he straddled my waist and lifted his shirt high above his head then tossed it menacingly aside. My eyes feasted on his now exposed chest. I reached out hungrily to capture one nipple, rubbing and pinching gently. He let out a moan of pure ecstasy.  
  
That aroused me even more, and wanting to be dominant one, I flipped us over and pinned him beneath me firmly. Smirking as he did so earlier, I removed my own robes and discarded it carelessly aside. I captured his lips with my own, loving his taste. My hands were roaming all around his body, touching every part I could get my hands to... his chest, his stomach and even further down.  
  
He arched his back, giving me more access to him. He grinded his hips in the most tantalizing way that only one thing entered my thick, hazy head. I wanted to take him right here and now. Smiling evilly I reach for the tube in the side table when I heard something hit the floor hard.  
  
Irritatingly I lifted my head to find where the source of the noise was. When I turned to look I saw the saru randomly throwing things off. Vases, plates, cups, the kappa, the cook.... WHAT THE HELL?!  
  
I looked down to check who I was pining down the bed. I was sure it was the saru.... I mean I would only consider the saru to be my partner in bed. And nobody else. But instead of seeing large, golden eyes and a smiling face, I see a wrinkled old face, a foul mouth and a pair of dull blue eyes. Wait.... That dull eyes of hers... I choked from realization.  
  
OH MY GOD. Her eyes held in it desire and lust. I jumped so high from disgust, my head hit the ceiling.  
  
"O-o-obasan?! What do you think you're doing?" I shrieked out loud despairingly. She was holding her hands out as if she wanted to pull me right back in the bed. I was surprised and very pissed. What am I doing fucking a little old lady?! Where is the world coming to?  
  
"Shame on you Sanzo!" Goku said disapprovingly whilst helping the old lady dress up. He looks up at me with darkened gold eyes and a frown on his face. I tried to reach him and say that it wasn't my fault but then I see Gojyo and Hakkai, a bemused expression on their faces. It was uncanny.  
  
The kappa and the cook which Goku also dropped to the floor, I don't know why too so don't ask me, came crawling to my feet like two hungry zombies, totally uncoordinated.  
  
"Shame on you....." They repeated over and over again. I backed up against the wall slightly scared. I don't know what happened but suddenly my senses grew so active I could hear and see everything. Probably because of my guilt, anger and probably because I was a little shaken by Gojyo, Hakkai and Goku's reaction. They looked ready to kill if you ask me.  
  
I could hear my heart thump madly in my chest, could hear the pitter patter of steps of a walking cockroach, could even hear the clicking of the watch...situated above my head. I have to get out of here. I let my eyes roam around the place. Surely there must be a way out.  
  
I looked to my side and saw minuscule dirt on the windowsill sitting there innocently. No help whatsoever. I thought as I brought my eyes elsewhere. At the far end of the room I could see a small hole in the wall, about the size of my hand. Hmmm...Maybe... Hazy and stupid thoughts flashed through my head as well as the red warning lights.  
  
Gojyo and Hakkai had closed the distance on us and Goku had called forth his nyoibo. They were out to get their revenge on me! I thought wildly. But I don't really get it. Why are they all so worked out about the obasan? It isn't their granny or something right? I think I deserve to at least give an explanation about all this.  
  
I opened my mouth to start saying something when the two zombies.... Errr... I mean Gojyo and Hakkai, stood up and started balling a ki in the palm of their hands. They were ready to fire anytime!  
  
In panic I asked myself the only one thing I could think of: Could I fit through the hole in the wall?!  
  
Looking one last time at the delusional faces of my three youkai companions.... I ran towards the wall in full force, chanting all the while: I could get through the hole, I could get through the hole, I could get through the hole...  
  
With a last burst of energy I plunged myself to the wall as hard as I can..... And plummeted back to the waiting arms of..... Goku.  
  
DAMMIT I COULD'NT GET THROUGH THE HOLE IN THE WALL!!!! I thought, panicked. My eyes grew wide as I saw Goku transform into Seiten Taisen.  
  
His diadem broke, his eyes changed into cat like slits, his hair grew longer and.... OUCH. His nails grew longer too! I thought as I felt it dig deep in my skin.  
  
At the sides, Gojyo and Hakkai had completely gone back to normal and they had stopped their attack. Their ki ball had been reduced to nothing and they were clapping the granny's back and they were laughing together gaily. Their smug voices floated to my ever active ears. "Mission accomplished!!!"  
  
The forgotten saru suddenly hissed and I was tossed high in the air. "You're mine perverted bouzo!!!"  
  
I couldn't do anything dignified at the moment so I did the only thing I could do: SCREAM. To scream my bloody, fucking voice out.  
  
"AHHHHHHHHH!!!!"  
  
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I sat up in bed drenched to the skin with sweat. I ran my hand to my hair and drew long, ragged breaths. I brought a hand to my chest to feel the mad hammering of my heart. Despaired I dropped my forehead to my knees and hugged myself.  
  
Why must it happen to me? I moaned to myself, trying to forget that fucking so real dream.  
  
For three days straight now... I'm having dreams of the same content. Me fucking the saru then Hakkai and Gojyo and a nameless man or woman or whoever is the flavor of the nightmare, would interrupt us and fucking beat me up.  
  
I tossed the bed sheets and stood up. Grabbing a cigarette, I went to the windowsill to brood. These dreams, uh, more appropriately nightmares, must be telling me something. I've heard somewhere that some special, gifted persons have prophetic dreams. They can foretell the future or they give warnings to might what happen in the future. Oh you know.... so you could prevent it.  
  
Maybe I'm having them. I thought to myself sulking. I took a long drag on my cigarette and blew lazy circles of smoke. If you ask me there are just damn too many things to interpret in my dreams.  
  
From my dreams, there is only one thing I'm certain to interpret: I'm madly, truly, deeply infatuated with the saru. I've tried to deny that to myself numerous of times but to no avail. Goku had completely been the ruler of my dreams, my fantasies....My everything.  
  
I snorted. When have I been so sentimental?! Really. Being so connected with a saru who is oblivious to your true motives and feelings about is bad for your health. Very bad. Look what it's done to me. I'm a complete basket case.  
  
Apart from that interpretation I still have lots of things in mind, like... Hakkai and Gojyo. Every single time they appear to disturb me and the saru and they prevail too. And what's more, every single time they prevail they say: Mission accomplished! I mean, what's up with that?!!!  
  
And the other characters in my dreams too are in on Gojyo and Hakkai's plan. Whatever it is. I rolled my eyes in disgust. Hmmp. Maybe they are just jealous of me and Goku. I thought smugly.  
  
Well that's it really. That's all there is to interpret. They're trying to sabotage me and the saru. But no matter what they'll do, I'll prevent it. Whatever the cost is. My amethyst eyes glowed in conviction. Of course, I'll do anything in my power. Anything at all.  
  
I think I'm feeling better now. Yup. They're jealous of me and Goku. That's all there is to it. I stood up and stretched a smug smile on my lips. Dream or reality they're never going to take Goku away from me. May it be Gojyo, Hakkai, an elderly crone, an elf, a kami, a prince or whatever.  
  
The half smile forming on my mouth suddenly drooped. Outside, on the yard of the inn stood Hakkai and Goku. I don't know why, but the two had ecstatic smiles on their faces. Then suddenly, to my horror.... Hakkai bent down to Goku. They're so close together!!! I thought shrilly.  
  
I feel the world stop, the seconds going by ever so slowly. I hear from the distance.... Gojyo and Hakkai's voice, repeating over and over again: Mission Accomplished.  
  
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Goku's POV  
  
"Hakkai! Do you think Sanzo will like this?" I asked him as I motioned Hakkai came over. He peered closely at what I was holding.  
  
"Hold it out, Goku. I can't see it clearly." Hakkai complained as he adjusted his monocle, laughing mildly. I beckoned him closer.  
  
"Shhhh!!! And come here a little more. I don't want to risk Sanzo seeing this. It's a surprise for him, remember? And you know he has eagle eyes!" Hakkai just smiled and drew himself closer to me, when I was satisfied that he covers me well enough, I held out my treasure proudly.  
  
"Is it what they call a dream catcher?" Hakkai asked me a bemused smile on his face.  
  
"Uhuh! Do you think he'll like it?" I asked him expectantly.  
  
"Hmmmm.. I don't know. In the first place why'd you brought him a dream catcher? What made you think he'd want it?" Hakkai asks as he crouched down to my level. Hmm... Probably tired of his squatting position. I thought reflectively.  
  
"Well.... He complains that he's always having bad dreams.... Well he's not literally complaining but.... Did you see those large eye bags? I doubt if he sleeps for two hours each night." I stopped to see if Hakkai's still listening, he still was so I continued.  
  
"But with this one's help, I hope he gets to have more pleasant dreams. Maybe he'll enjoy his sleeping hours, from now on." I thought as I scrunched my forehead thinking deeply.  
  
"If that's the case then I think he will.... OUCH!!!!" Hakkai jumped up from his sitting position and madly tries to reach for his back.  
  
"What's the matter Hakkai?!" I asked concerned.  
  
"Something hit me!! ITAI!!!!" He yelled again as he jumps around the place in vain attempt to lose whatever it is on his back. It was so funny I had to stifle a laugh. I mean Hakkai bobbing up and down, and scratching madly at his back?! Come on. You rarely see the guy lose poise!  
  
"What?! Did something hit you again?" I asked going around Hakkai impulsively, checking if there's something I could do to help. Even if it's a funny sight, I collected myself long enough to help him. He's always there for me if I needed him. Oh you know, cooking food, taking my side all those little stuff.  
  
"NO!! Something biting me!!" He continues to reach out to his back. I stilled him to check what's on his back. I gasped.  
  
"Hakkai!!! You've got gazillions of ants on your back!!!" I said while stifling a laugh.  
  
"What?!!!" Hakkai abandoned me in search of a lake. I looked after him until he rounded the corner. Ooooops. He slipped in the mud in his haste. Hehehehe.. I heard a splash and a loud: AHHHH of relief.  
  
Good thing there's a lake nearby. I thought to myself as I let my eyes roam over to Sanzo's window. I jumped back from fright when I saw a pair of insanely, glowing mad green eyes.  
  
t.b.c  
  
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A/N: Kitsune_me!!! I finished it! And as promised this is dedicated to perverted ole you!!! Hehehe... Joke! Hmmmm.. And I also would like to extend my deepest gratitude to ice krystahl!! She helped me with this story and she beta reads for me!!! Thank you!!! I know you wanted me to say more but... nope, nothing else.  
  
So what do you guys think? Should I continue? Although, if ever, Hehehehe... There's going to be a lot of Sanzo oocness in the future and a lot of further madness. 


	2. Hakkai

A/N: Another chapter of madness…………..

Chapter 1

            What a fucking piece of cake. I thought smugly as I looked into the slightly trembling form of our companion, our driver, Hakkai. 

I suppressed a fucking happy smile. Oh you know I'm not really known as a smiling lad and I'm more like the……… uh, expressionless, heartless, ruthless, frowning bastard. 

If these three sarus, oh yes three, including the ever grinning Hakkai, see me in all smiles they might point an accusing finger on me, might caught up that it was indeed me, yes me, who caused the nice man to have a severe trauma. 

Severe trauma you say? Ohohoho…….. All right, I'll tell you. Hakkai have a phobia now. The phobia is, of course, getting close to Goku. You see, every time he gets within 1 ft. radius of Goku disaster strikes upon him. I wonder why? I thought sarcastically as I rolled my eyes discretely.

Now back to what I was saying. I've now considered Hakkai as a saru. You want to know why? It's because he didn't give me a damn, fucking challenge. And I thought he was one tough nut. I mean, he gave up in only three days! I sighed and took a long, lazy drag on my cigarette.

And I was really looking forward in making him learn his lesson. Oh you know the lesson that he should keep his damn sharp nails out of my Goku. I still had a lot of mischief and ideas in mind to make him suffer the wrath of the big green eyed monster. 

"Oi, Hakkai aren't we there yet? I'm hungry." Goku suddenly said out of nowhere that even I was startled. Goku leaned in and touched Hakkai's shoulders. My eyes bore into Goku's hand. 

Goku's hand on Hakkai's shoulders………… Goku's hand on Hakkai's shoulders……………. Like a mantra it repeated over and over again in my head. I'm getting the headache and I'm steaming mad. 

And I thought he learned his lesson! I thought angrily as I tried vainly to keep my composure. I am sure that in no time at all, smoke would emit out of my nose because of irritation. 

"Uh, uh, uh, I-I th-th-ink we'll be the-re-re in about 3 hours." Hakkai said stammering badly. He shifted his shoulders discretely as to move Goku's hand. I smirked to myself. _Good move, Hakkai._

"3 hours?! But I'm hungry!" The saru whined yet again as he propped his chin on top of Hakkai's head. Hmmm…….. Did I say that smoke was coming out of my nose? Look, it's coming out of my ears too!

I was quite pleased to see Hakkai trembling badly now. Thank the heavens for the good effect of post trauma! 

"Uh, Go-go-ku………… Pl-ple-ase get off me…….." Hakkai pleaded to Goku. The saru just scrunched his forehead in confusion.

"Why?!"

"Bakasaru! It's because he's traumatized by you!!" Gojyo yelled as he pulled Goku by his cape making the saru tumble on his bum.

"Ouch!!! But why?!" The saru asked concerned. He looked at Hakkai, a little worried.

Damn! I could get Hakkai's phony nails out of Goku but I can't get him out of the saru's mind!!! What must a buozo do?!! I thought steaming. My mind was racing with hazy thoughts. I will get even…………. I looked at Hakkai sideways and smiled. Bright ideas always come to those who need it………..

"Don't you notice? Every time you get close to Hakkai, something terribly bad happens to him." Gojyo explained exasperatedly.

"No I don't!" Goku indignantly said.

            "Okay, let me recount all the mishaps Hakkai went through." Gojyo held up finger one.

"One. He was bathed with ants. You know the gazillion ants that left this terrible bite marks?" _Ah yes. The start of all madness. I just saw this rotten mango, and it was completely covered with feasting ants, up on that tree they were under and it happens to be directly above Hakkai. Then right atop my table sat an innocent, little slingshot and lots of bottle caps. A sharp shooter like me can't miss that target ever. Especially if my life depended on it. Gojyo held finger two._

"Two. You served him these meat buns that made him throw up the whole day." _Hehehe………… This was a little bit tricky. Goku was really worried about Hakkai because of the angry red marks the ants had left. He came to me asking what he should do to cheer Hakkai up. I told him to get Hakkai something to eat. Naturally I offered that I would get the food. I found this tantalizing bottle of pills that makes you feel like you ate something bad hence you throw up. I inserted a good 5 pills on each bun. Hakkai ate three. _The kappa held finger three.

"Three. You almost blinded him. I don't know how it happened, but do you remember how Hakkai's monocle broke right in his face? I swear if Hakkai weren't fast enough, those shards of tiny glass would've pierced his eyes." _Hmmmm………. By far the most difficult. I discretely stole Hakkai monocle to make it ever so brittle so at the slightest contact…….. BOOM. I returned it the same night. It was like it never left his bedside table. If I'm not mistaken, it's really Goku's fault. His spit landed smack in the middle of Hakkai's monocle, and like I say, the slightest contact will be enough. Hehehe……. That's why I always tell him to chew with his mouth closed. It can be lethal you know?!_ Finger four.

"And the last straw. Hakuryu almost died!!!! You know how Hakkai loves that little pest dragon!!!"

"Gojyo……… Ha-haku-ryu's not a pest!!!" Hakkai said still stammering but his eyes held conviction in them. _Oh, how sweet. The love of master to pet. How touching._

"Ooooops. Sorry." Gojyo said while waving his hands. _Back to why Hakuryu almost died. Its kind of right after Hakkai's monocle broke. The kappa and the saru quickly went to his side, really worried. The sight of Goku clutching Hakkai's hands tightly and Hakkai patting Goku's head to shush him down really took the last bit of sanity I had. I stood up to excuse myself at the very same time I 'accidentally' knocked of my plate. The silverware, more precisely the butter knife, sailed through the air in clean arc, it would've hit Hakkai's other eye if not for that loyal pest of his. _

"Teme!!!! Are you implying that I'm doing all of it to Hakkai?!" Goku asked the kappa shrilly. Gojyo turned his bored, red eyes towards Goku.

"Ah, so you mean you aren't causing it?"

"Of course! Why would I do it to him?" Gojyo shrugged.

            "I don't know." 

"Teme!!!!!!!!" The two sarus went off to bicker. The spiteful buozo must now do his act. And I also think its about time for Gojyo to hold finger five.

"URUSAI!!!!" I yelled in character, I fired my gun upwards. Two shots. But if you're eyes are quick enough……. I did three.

"Ahh……… You made Sanzo angry again…………" Goku said while hugging Gojyo back in fright.

"ME?!!! You're the one who…………" They bickered again.

"What's that smell?!!!" Goku said as he sniffed around. _Keep composure……… Keep composure………… Act like you don't know what's happening………_

"OH MY GOD!!!!!! HAKKAI YOUR HAIR IS ON FIRE!!!!" Gojyo yelled as he stood up from the back seat and tried vainly to put the fire out.

"What the fuck?!" I contributed wisely as I stepped on the break to help. Finding a cup of water by my side, I quickly dumped it on Hakkai's head. Instead of putting the fire out, it became intense. _Oooops……… It's not a cup of water……… its oil. Gasoline. Highly flammable stuff._

Hakkai had his eyes wide with fright and he could not react. It was as if he was frozen in his seat. Thankfully Goku really found water. He wetted his cape and tossed it on Hakkai's head, in an instant the fore was put out.

"Are you alright Hakkai?!" Goku asked as he patted Hakkai's back. Hakkai whimpered and jumped from the jeep in fright. He looked back at Goku with large, mad eyes. The he set foot in the forest.

"Hakkai!!! Wait up!!!" Gojyo yelled as he too jumped from the jeep to catch up with the nice man. Goku yelled that he'll come as well.

"No stay with the bouzo! Besides Hakkai won't appreciate it if you're there." Gojyo yelled back at Goku. 

_Hmmmm__……………………. Good night's sleep for me._ I thought smugly as I looked at the two's retreating form_. I'm sure I won't have the nightmare and they won't be saying: __Mission__ accomplished anymore. _

_If there is a person who will be saying that………. It will be me._

_--------------------------------------------------------_

_A/N: Thanks for all those reviewed!!! Really appreciated it. Hope you like these chap as well._

_M-i: Green-eyed monster is a metaphor for a very jealous person. That's why Sanzo's eyes glowed green…….. you know……… the symbolize his jealousy. Hehehehe…… __J___


	3. Kougaiji

I woke up just as the sun made its way to the horizon. On normal occasions, I would have admired the beauty of the rising sun. I don't know why, but it always amazes me to see it breaking the dawn with its riot of yellow, orange and red colors. The reason why I'm always fascinated with it is because it reminds me that we have survived yet another day unscathed. With our entire journey to the west, it is a feat to survive each day. 

I sighed. This is not a normal day so even I, am not fazed with the light. You want to know why? It's because I thought those stupid, fucking nightmares are over!!

Yes. Indeed. I had another mother of nightmares. And I thought it's all over since I have taken care of Hakkai. But no. NO!!! They just became intense.

Okay. Given the fact that I had eliminated Hakkai on my path forever, I am not yet through with Gojyo. Yes, he appeared AGAIN. Appeared right before things got interesting between the saru and me.

And not only did he interrupt, he brought a new companion too!! I crossed my arms over my chest in irritation. Let me give you a little clue on which the kappa had brought along with him. In my dream of course.

Hmmmm… Let me see. Let's start with that annoying long, red hair. He has wine colored eyes too, a jacket he keeps wide open, exposing his magnificent abs and a lot of unnecessary accessories. What else...? Oh yes. When he comes to visit, he always brings along this, girl saru, with orange hair and annoying, grating voice. She also claims that I am her playmate. Is that enough clue already?

It's not?! Well, okay one last clue. He's the one and only youkai prince. You get it know, huh? Kougaiji. I spat the name angrily as I looked into the driver's seat, checking if the infamous cook had already returned. He's not, so the day won't be that bad.

I shifted in my seat and was overly surprised to feel some weight on my lap. Slowly, and hoping too, I looked down.

I had to stifle a shout of joy when I saw, Goku lying in my lap. He looks so innocent, with his unruly brown hair spilling on his face and his partially open mouth. I reach down to brush a few strands of hair on his face when he snorted.

_What the……?!! Is he awake? _I asked myself panicking. Calming my braced nerves, I looked at him closely as he unleashed another powerful snort. I chuckled. _Now that's kawaii! _I thought as I realized he was snoring.

I reach for his head again to caress his face. For me, moments like these are golden opportunities. It's when I become soft and caring. I know it's useless, since nobody knows this side of me anyways because I always do this when I am certainly and absolutely sure that no one in watching.

I continue to touch his face until he stirred. Like a child who had been caught stealing a cookie from the cookie jar I withdrew my hand from Goku's face.

"Ohayou, Sanzo." Goku said sleepily as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. Note that he's still on my lap. *grins* Then ever so slowly his eyes widened as saucers and he leapt from surprise.

"Gomen Sanzo!!! I didn't mean to sleep on your …… ummm… lap! But I was so scared last night!! I'm not used to being alone at the back of the jeep and since Hakkai is not…" He stammered and continued to babble. I shook my head in annoyance and wonder. _Am strict and that scary?_

On impulse, I put my hand on his mouth to shut him up. I knew he would never stop babbling until his breath runs out. And much as I love him, I really hate grating, annoying voices early in the morning. Especially now that I haven't smoked and read the newspaper.

"It's okay." I told him without preamble. If you think his eyes couldn't get wider, it did. He looked at me as if I had grown another head.

"Are you sure Sanzo?" My infamous fan made its appearance. I whacked him in the head.

"Itai!! What did you do that for?!" Goku demanded as he vigorously rubbed his sore head.

"It's because you're so damn stupid!! Didn't I tell you its okay?!" I told him much fiercely than I had intended. He turned away from me, but not before I saw that pout marring his usually genki face.

"It's because I'm not used to it. I'm really sorry." Hearing him so sad makes me kind of sad too. Not to mention guilty. I reach out to touch his shoulder to apologize. Yup, I'm going to apologize. Sounds delusional right? But… It's Goku and I can't do anything about it. For once I let my heart do the talking and not my stupid, egoistic mind.

"Goku?" I call softly. No response from him. Worse he stiffened under my touch_. What the hell happened??! Don't tell me he's already afraid of me! I mean I've whacked him thousands of times and still…_

"Oi, Goku are you angry…" I let my voice trail when I suddenly picked up demonic ki. I lift my eyes to see the smirking face of the one and only Kougaiji.

"How touching." He sneered as he let his gaze drop to my hand, which was still conveniently on Goku's shoulder. I immediately withdrew my hand and gave him the best death glare I could muster.

"So early in the morning Kougaiji? You really know how to spoil a bouzo's day." I muttered as I grabbed the last cigarette of its pack and lit it up.

"Baldie Sanzo!!! Let's play!!" Lilin sang out as she hopped from behind his brother and leapt towards me. Instinctively I put out my arms and caught her swiftly at the nape. Before she could say anything I stuffed my super-kept-for-emergencies only buns.

"Wai~~~ Thanks baldie Sanzo!!!" Lilin manage to choke out as she began eating the buns. 

"Son Goku how long are you planning to sit? I missed our fight!!" Kougaiji jeered Goku who I noted, looked shocked at the early arrival. He looked behind Kou.

"Where are Yaone and Doku? You always come with them…." Goku trailed as he hesitantly called forth his nyoibo. 

"Oh them. I left them at the castle. My first plan was really to visit you all alone, but then…" He looked sideways at where Lilin and I sit.

"I didn't notice her coming along." Kou in turn looked around.

"Where are Gojyo and Hakkai?" Goku looked a little bit somber at the mention of Hakkai's name.

"They went somewhere." He said but then shook his head as if trying to clear his thoughts out.

"No matter Kougaiji!! I'll still fight you!" Goku yelled as he launched into the air and unleashed a savage blow on Kou's stomach.

The fight went on but I'm suddenly on my on little world. All I could hear was the conversation of Kougaiji and Goku. _I was planning to visit you all alone…  I missed you…_

With whirling thoughts and quickly building anger I punched the ground to let some frustration.

_Who the hell Kougaiji think he is? Saying all those things to Goku!! And what's with the 'I miss you thing'?!_ I was steaming mad and I could vaguely feel the rush of blood to my face. Lilin turned to see what was going on with me, but then the stupid saru that she is, she just shrugged and returned to munching on her buns.

Then with sickening realization, I remembered the dream. That fucking nightmare. Kougaiji and Gojyo had thrown me in a vast see of flames. They were laughing maniacally and both were holding these big stupid looking, ridiculous forks and were poking me with it restlessly. 

I had screamed like a bloody little girl and they both reveled in seeing me acting so disgracefully. Then as a last show of supremacy they summoned Goku who had magically appeared between them. Then right before my jealous eyes, started kissing him. And to my surprise the saru didn't fight back. Instead he looked at me straight in the eye, a smirk on his face. Thankfully, before more graphic images came to mind, I woke up. 

But now that I see Kougaiji in the flesh, my hatred and anger in the nightmare vented itself on the real Kougaiji. _I have to do something about this._ I thought as my eyes went into slits and my brain working over time for some creative mischief.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_Kougaiji is just too much!!! How can he call that piece of shit, a fight move?!! He's just touching Goku's bum!!! _I raged inwardly as the fight progresses on. I've been watching patiently the fight go on for about 5 minutes now. 5 minutes of great understanding...... understanding that what they are doing is nothing but fighting.

_But......._ I look yet again at the smirking face of Kougaiji and had drawn the conclusion that this fight is not really a 'fight'. _Just look at how happy his face is!!! _Goku is thrashing him around like mad and every inch of skin is covered in gash and bruises and ......._ He's still smiling!!_ It's either he's gone bananas_, which I'm sure he doesn't,_ or that he's a closest sadist_,_ _hmmm...... I'm pretty sure he's not a sadist........ I mean he does look nice and al, thinking youkai perceptive of course....._ or he's enjoying the contact between him and Goku.

I clutched my hand tightly, feeling the blood circulation stop, but I don't care. My jealousy level is up to sky limit now. _If I don't do something I'm gonna burst!!! _I thought to myself wildly as I desperately tried to keep my cool. When I thought that I couldn't stand it any longer and my gut is telling me that I had to rip out Kougaiji out of the face of the world entirely, Lilin took that time to tug my robes.

"What do you want gaki?!" I asked irritated.

"Do you have more food?" She asks me, with sparkles in her eyes. Oh, so the gaki is also a bottomless pit like my Goku. I thought fondly as I felt for my robes.

You know what? These robes are multi-purpose. I mean, I could just tuck in about anything in here. Well for starters, the harisen I always have with me is hidden somewhere beneath these robes, of course my gun is in here too, although they are probably lost somewhere in its billowing sheaths but...... I'm pretty sure it's down there somewhere too. And lastly, where do you think I hide all these emergency food rations for the gaki?! Of course in my robes too!!! If I'd leave them in plain sight, a certain saru will certainly feast on it.

Hmmm..... so now you know about my robes, certainly you won't be surprised that I found bananas hidden in there too. I thrust them to the annoying gaki.

"There. I have no more buns, I hope they'll satisfy you."

"Wai~~~ sank you!!! Bananas are just my second favorite to the buns!! You're sugoi, Baldie Sanzo!!!" I wince at the name but remained expressionless otherwise.

"Gaki, give me back the peelings after you're done."

"Watcha gonna do?! Eat it?!!" She asks me innocently. I reach out for my harisen, oh you know, the one tucked in my robes and hit her with all my might.

"Itai!!! What was that for Baldie Sanzo?!" She pouted but continued to eat nonetheless.

"Baka!! Why would I eat peelings?" She shrugged.

"I don't know..... "

"Tch." I watch her eat for several more minutes before making a grab for the peelings. I have work to do.

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Lilin's POV

_Baldie__ Sanzo's acting really weird. I mean what will he do with those peelings? Eat them? If you ask me, it's totally pointless. I may be a living vacuum of foods, but even I, don't eat peelings. Hmmm…….. Maybe he has other things in mind….. I shrug to myself as I ate more of it._

_Besides, what business do I have with him and his peelings? So long as he gives me food, then there will be absolutely no problem._ I look sideways at Baldie Sanzo who looks really, really concentrated about something. His eyes are also focused somewhere on Brother's and saru's fight. I followed his gaze. Brother had saru in a headlock. And it's looks to me that brother is getting the upper hand. Just look at his face!! He's so happy!!

_Hoooooo…….. Does he have a thing on brother?!!! His look is so sticky!! Ooooh, maybe Baldie Sanzo is jealous.  _I giggle to myself as I peeled another banana. Just as I bent my head down I heard big brother scream.

"Whoaaaa~!!" I look up just in time to see brother slide on the muddy ground and head straight to the mud pit face first. _Splaaaashh…..!_

Me, saru and Baldie Sanzo took a moment of silence. I was shocked at brother's clumsiness, it never, ever happened before!!! Big brother stood up hesitatingly……. Our eyes traveled to the mud pit…….

"WAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!" Baldie Sanzo, me and saru all laughed together. _Hehehehe…… I better stop laughing really; I mean leaving your impression on the mud pit is not really that funny right? Ahahahaha…….Yeah right?!!!_

"Kou—ahahaha—gaiji--ahaha!!! Better leave that impression there!!! We could make clones out of you using that!!! Wahahahaahaha!!!!" Saru laughed so hard he was rolling on the ground maniacally.

"Urusai!!" Big brother, scolded them, getting really red in the face. Well, I mean, you could see him getting red if your eyes are really good…….. His face was caked with mud.

"Ohohohoho……. Kougaiji!!! Ohoho…. You look, you look….. ohohohoho….." Baldie Sanzo laughed so hard too, he was clutching his sides tightly.

"Sanzo!!! You laughing too?!! URUSAI!!!!" Brother scolded again, this time trying to clean up his muddy face. Instead of cleaning it up, it became worse. Mud has gotten in his eyes with all the scrubbing and he had swallowed some, since he's talking while cleaning up.

"Wahahaha….. stop it already Kou!!! Don't know you were such a riot!!! Ahahaha….." Saru stopped laughing long enough to utter that sentence.

"Ahahaha……" I bursted out laughing, finally. Brother glared at me angrily.

"Whose side are you on?!! I swear I'll never let you come with me again.!!!" Brother swore so seriously that I stopped laughing almost immediately. 

"Sorry brother!!! Gambatte!!!" I cheered out while I watch brother, lash out and straddled the saru who was still writhing on the ground laughing. 

At my side Baldie Sanzo stopped laughing too. I looked at him questioningly.

"What's the matter Baldie? Don't like watching the fight?"

"No. Uninteresting." Sanzo said evenly, a weird glimmer in his eyes again. 

"Wanna eat some fish?" Baldie asked me_. Well, now that he mentioned it, I feel a bit hungry. _I smiled.

"Of course!!!! Demo……." I looked at him closely and behind him too.

"You don't seem to have fish." I tell him deflated.

"So we'll fish." He said non chantly as he whipped out from his robes a fishing rod.

"There isn't any lake here." I pouted. Sanzo sighed.

"Then what's there behind you?" I turned around and saw a ……. Lake.

"Wah! When did it get there?!!" I shrieked.

"Baka!! It's there the whole time. You're itsy, beety brain just didn't notice it…… And you have big eyes and all that crap." Sanzo muttered.

"I heard that!!!" I warned him, but then he just rolled his eyes. _So that means, it doesn't sound like a warning…. _

"Whatever." He sighed as he made a show of his fishing rod. He put it up high in the air making a great big lasso.

"Sugoi…." I breathed as I watched him circle it out a few more times. Then he leaned it back……… So that he could reach far beyond the lake and then pull it back as hard as he could. _RRRIIIIIIPPPPPP!!!!_

_What the heck!!! I _thought to myself confused._ Fishing rods don't make ripping noises…… Only cloth, paper and ummm…. Some food does. _

The fishing rods hook came lassoing back and I saw…….. a pair of pants. _What the???!! It's either the saru or brother!!!!_

"BWahahahaha!!!! Can't stand it any longer!!!! BAwahahaha…… " Saru burst out laughing once again. Baldi and my head snapped in their direction.

"Bwahahahaha!!!! Such a funny man Kougaiji!!!!" Baldie laughed out once again.

"Teme!!!! It was you Sanzo!!! You're the who have the fishing rod!!!" Kougaiji stalked in front of Sanzo.

"Rod? What rod?" He asks innocently. Sure enough, there was no rod.

"Teme!!! Where did you hide it??!!" Kougaiji said as he started to roam his hands on Baldie's body. Baldie glared at him. 

"Are you implying I hid them under my robes?? How idiot could you get? How could I fit it in inside!!!!!" Sanzo raged as he continued to give Brother his infamous glare. It must've been intense because brother flinched. 

_Oh yeah, it's a good thing brother wears under shorts…… the reason why Baldie and saru is laughing is because he's wearing his Mr. Smiley boxer shorts. Happy, happy! _

"Oi, Kou!!! Aren't we going to continue the fight?! Oh wait! You're cheating aren't you? You're wearing me out by making me laugh so you could get the upper hand? Aren't you? Huh? Kou?" Saru asked as he scrunched hi's forehead.

"I'm not!! Do I look stupid?" Brother raged. Baldie and Sanzo nodded.

"TEME!!!! Let's fight now!!!" Brother made another lunge but saru just smiled…… Looks like he's going to laugh any minute now……

"What are you smiling at?!!!" Brother asked as he dropped his stance.

"Kou……. I don't mind if you wear your pants first." Saru said as he pointed to Mr. Smiley. Brother blushed.

"URUSAI!!!!" Brother made a grab for his pants, now hanging by a tree and quickly stiffed himself in.

"I'm going to get you for this…….." He muttered as he finished putting it on.

"So am I." Baldie said under his breath.

_Huh?_

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A/N: Hey guys!!! Sorry for taking too long to update!!!! The hell week is over (finals week) and I'm just celebrating by writing!!! Hehehe……

Kitsune_me: Hey! Hope I made you smile at least……. Better if you forget the  uhhh…… um. Better not mention it. You might break into hives again. Hehehe…. Just kidding!!! Me not making sense? I just watched rave so that explains a whole lot!!! Well, anyway hope you enjoy your vacation!! (kinda wish I could go to baguio too…… it's a little colder there…..)

For those who reviewed, my big appreciation.

Oh yeah who would you want Sanzo to torture next? Although, the Kou harassment isn't over yet…… 

Reviews please!!!!


	4. kougaiji part2

A/N: Hey, guys! I need your input on who you want Sanzo to torture next….. So if you have someone in mind just give me a holler……. The character most requested to be tortured will be next one featured! Thanks!

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Lilin's POV

I always have known that my big brother is a good fighter.  I also know that he is the most graceful, smooth youkai I've ever known. Well, okay I didn't think of the last one coz what do I care about being graceful, smooth and all that crap. I wouldn't recognize clumsy from elegant if my life depended on it. I just heard it from Yaone.

Well anyway, before I get steered into a different topic or before I reveal anymore secrets that I'm not supposed to say……… I noticed that indeed something is wrong with my big brother. I mean, I've never seen him slip on his own. Sure he gets on his bum at times but that's because he and the saru are fighting. Note that it's only the saru who gives him a hard time.

Secondly, when his pants got off……. I'm pretty sure it wasn't Baldie because when big brother stalked him, he wasn't holding the rod anymore. So it's either big brother had a loose pants or he just snagged it from some tree. Either way it's a big miscalculation on his part and to think that he's great with planning and  all that stuff. Oh you know, he's always the one in charge of our forces…… directs them or something. And if it isn't the Sanzo-ikkou we're fighting we're almost always victorious.

Thirdly, well okay, it has nothing to do with my big brother but with Baldie. He's acting real weird if you ask me. He gives me food without complain. And remember with the fishing? He even asked me if I was still hungry! If he was his normal self, he wouldn't have offered me food without me asking for it! It just seems so plain weird!

And what's more he's eyeing my brother like he wants his gaze to burn him! If you could just see Baldie now, you'd know what I'm talking about. Just imagine this: Baldie Sanzo sits as straight as a rod against the tree we're leaning in. He had his eyes fixed on big brother, it was flaming amethyst and he looks calculating. If you get within radius of his sight you'd crash and burn. And what's more he had his left hand on his chin, a sign that's he's thinking deeply, and his right on holding a bun to my face. Now isn't he a wee bit disturbing?!

I continued to munch on the bun Baldie gave me, much slowly. I look at him, then at brother who was getting black and blue by the minute, and back at hi again. If I didn't know better you'd think Baldie Sanzo had a crush on my big brother. But I think that's not the case. His eyes held hate in them.  Yeah, I know how to distinguish that…….. Hate. You know why? It's because that's the way my mother looks at me. And I don't like it one bit.

"Damn that little critter……." Baldie suddenly whispered beside me.

"What did you say, Baldie?" I ask him my eyebrows knitted in confusion.

"Nothing…….. And mind your own business!!!" Baldie said angrily as he reached for the bun I my mouth and took it.

"Hey! Why'd you do that for?" I pouted as I tired to reach the half-eaten bun form his grasp.

"It's my bun, and I have the right to take it!"

"But you already gave it to me!"

"As I said, I own it, I take, whenever I want!"

"But why?"

"Because you're so damn noisy and you need punishment!"

"I'm not noisy! And besides, it's not that quiet anyways!!!" I almost screamed as I gestured at saru's and big brother's fight. Right now, brother had summoned his monster and it was causing a great big ruckus. Sand and dirt were flying everywhere and saru was suddenly immobilized by the move. Before returning to it's own void again, the monster made a great wind to continue the sand/dust storm and cried it's ear piercing cry.

"See, I told you it was already noisy!" I said as I stuck my tongue out at him. But I realize he wasn't looking at me. He was looking down right flabbergasted about something in the fight. I followed his gaze. Then I saw it. Amidst the sand and dust were saru and my brother. We can't really see them up-close. We could just see their silhouettes in the curtain of sand.

 But it looks like their doing something weird. Their bodies are so close together, you'd almost imagine that they were hugging. They faces are so close too!!! _Ooooooh!!!! I wonder what brother is doing to saru_! I squealed to myself as I leapt to my feet to see more. Baldie also leapt to his feet.

"Damn it. He's going to pay for this…….." I heard him mutter, and then he turned to walk away.

"Where you going Baldie?" I ask him again.

"None. Of. Your. Business. Now go away." I shrugged and just let him be. I'm still angry about the bun-is-mine attitude of his.

I look back at the fight and noticed that the curtain of dust and sand are gone. I can see clearly brother creaming Goku. Brother was head-butting Goku! _Oh, so that explains why their faces are so close together! I thought to myself. _Oh, and the hugging thing………. Saru had been punching brother at the abdomen too all the while brother head banged him_! _

My head drooped and so did my genkiness. I sat down again and leaned against the tree, not realizing that Baldie is back and is leaning against the tree too. _And I thought they were doing something else…….. Something naughty……_

"Want to fight shorty?" Baldie Sanzo suddenly said.

"What?" I asked not sure if I heard him correctly. As far as I know he never wanted to fight me because I'm a girl and I'm a child. In fact the rest of the ikkou thinks so too. They always give me around to fight, but no one really wants too,,,,,,, even the saru. It's lonely at times really……. Not having a good sparing partner……. _Oh, the pain of being so powerful and mighty_!

"I said want to fight?" Sanzo said impatiently. I still couldn't answer I was trying to figure out if he's really saying the truth.

"Hey, I said want to fight? I don't have all day." He lighted a cigarette and started to put it in his mouth. I swiped it away.

"I thought we're going to fight? What's with the relaxation mode?" Baldie smiled evilly then out of nowhere gave me a punch smack in my right cheek.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sanzo's POV

I unleashed a powerful blow right into girl saru's face. She seems a little bit shaken but after realizing that I'm dead serious, she grinned and leapt away, landing in a fighting stance. 

I don't bring out my gun. I actually don't want to accidentally kill her. I just need the girl to be my excuse for getting real close to Goku and Kougaiji. After that little scene in the curtain of dust, I snapped. I could only be patient for so long.

I mean graphic images on my drams I could take, because I knew that that didn't happen. But seeing it in reality bugs me. BIG TIME. Even Hakkai, long time close friend and confidante of Goku, never hugs him. Well, okay he did but he's taken care of. And all those who follow in Hakkai's footsteps must follow him all the way. It's only proper.

Because I don't want to see more of Kougaiji's exhibitions, I took the liberty to walk away and to think of some grand revenge. I came up with another brilliant one. Sometimes, I really don't know why I'm so damn amazing. Sorry for bringing up my own chair, but it's true. I swear when I'm through with Kougaiji he won't even think of showing his goddamn youkai face to me or to Goku.

But because I'm so wrapped in my own little world of revenge sometimes, Note to anyone who reads my thoughts: SOMETIMES, I didn't notice that Lilin had already made her move. Next thing I know was that her foot had made a painful contact somewhere on my tummy. I vaguely hear her screaming 'Lilin kick' too.

I dropped to the ground coughing up. I tell you, the wind was really knocked out of me. I really should give some credit to her. She isn't Gyumao's daughter for nothing, ain't she?

"Score one for Lilin!" She sang out happily. Much as I'd like to finish her off with my spirit ascending gun, I can't. I have other big plans for her. Actually, with my plan, she gets something extra nice. Because she's going to do something for me unwittingly. _If only I could get her to be hungry fast_. I thought to myself as I made a strategic run towards Kou and Goku.

I 'accidentally' bumped into Kou. At the same time I accidentally dropped something on his pocket. 

"Watch where you're going buozo!" Kou screamed as he paid for my 'stupidity' by receiving another vicious blow form Goku.

I didn't say anything. Lilin was charging towards me, squealing 'Lilin Punch'. I anticipated her punch that I had calculated wittingly in my head. I waited till the last possible minute before I pulled out. Lilin had no time to retract her fist. Her punch, made for me hit Kou squarely in the face.

"What the fuck?! Lilin, I'm you're brother!! We are supposed to fight them, not each other!!!" Kou screamed at the top of his lungs, throwing his arms up in exasperation. Lilin looked really, really sorry. It's almost funny really.

"I didn't mean it!!! It's all Baldie's fault!! He evaded it!"

"Well duh! That's the whole point! Someone attack you, you evade it." Goku suddenly butted in.

"Saru!!! I'm not talking you!!" Lilin said her eyes wide.

"Stop it!!!!" Kou screamed yet again. _Funny. Kou seems to be the motherly type_. I said to myself as I noticed that he had the tendency to give lectures to Lilin. Even if he's in the middle of a fight.

"Now, watch where you're slamming into, okay?" He said as patiently as he could. Well, the throbbing vein is a give away that he's near snapping point at his sister.

"Okay." Lilin said resignedly. But to my surprise she chirped up and was yelling 'Lilin kick' again. Before she beat the hell out of me I ran again, and yup you guessed it, right into Kougaiji.

"What the fuck?! Sanzo, I know you have eyes and everything……… Use it!!!!!" He said at my face so loudly and fast, I could feel specks of his spit fly into my face. I smile wryly at him.

"I would appreciate it too, if you didn't have to shower me with your saliva." I said as I noticed Kou getting five shades redder. I pranced away only to find out that Lilin is challenging Goku instead.

"Hey saru let's fight!" Lilin chirped excitedly.

"My opponent is Kou." Goku said blandly.

"But he and Baldie are busy." She whined. Goku was about to open his mouth to retort something when I slapped Lilin.

"What do you mean busy?! I'm not yet through with you yet!" She grinned her fanged grin.

"Now that's what I'd like to hear!" she said as she stood up and began to fight.

We fought for I'd don't how long. I do the same thing strategically. Hit her one time, evade, run on Kou, make Lilin hit Kou and the last and most important one, I must bump into the youkai prince.

Okay, I'll tell you why bumping into Kou is the most important move. It's because every time I did bump into him I drop off tiny little gifts into his clothes. You'll know later on what little gifts I'm talking about.

Since I'm now happy with the amount of gifts I've dropped or pasted in his clothes, note that I'd used the super-grand-almighty-never-falls-off glue to make sure it does stick, I stopped fighting and held up a hand at Lilin.

"Let's stop. I know that you are great fighter now. Let's just go back to the old ways."

"What old ways?" She asked confused.

"You don't know? Well the old way is……… We stand off to one side watch the fight and stay there."

"Oh…. That old way. You forgot one thing though." _Bingo._

"And what is it?"

"The feeding part of course!!!!"  I chuckled.

"Of course the feeding part." I said slyly. I looked at Kou and Goku's direction_. Oooops…. Not quite yet. They leaped around and found another spot. _Perfect_._

"Oi, Baldie!!!! I'm really, really hungry!!! You gave me rigorous exercise!!!! Feed meeeeee…………………." She whined. I grinned.

"I don't have the food. I dropped them somewhere."

"Where? Where? Did you drop them?" Lilin asked frantically.

"Right over there." I pointed to where Kou and Goku are. Then Like a spotlight, the buns, bananas and other food I had hidden in my multipurpose robes glistened in Kou's clothes. I hear Lilin gulp beside me, and then before I know it, she was rampaging directly at Kougaiji. I see Kou's eyes turn wide and Goku's face turned confused.

"FOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!" Lilin screamed at the top of her lungs as she lunged at Kou.

"Stop….. Stop….. STop…… Lilin STOPPPP!!!!" Kou screamed maniacally as his sister finally bounded on him and knocked him down; right on top of the impression he made earlier on the mud [1].

Lilin grabbed as much food as she can get. Goku meanwhile was eyeing Lilin and was trying to figure out what she was doing. Then he sniffed into the air, and with sudden realization…….

"Hey!!! Give me some too!!" Goku yelled as He lay on top of Kou too, getting as much food as Lilin allows him to get.

"This is my brother and any food on him is strictly mine!!!" Lilin said hautighly.

"But it came from Sanzo!! I should have one too!" He and Lilin fought each other right on top of Kou.

"Get the fucking off me!!" Kou screamed.

"Oooops, sorry." Both sarus said as they finally leapt off Kou. There was no food left so………

Kou wiggled and tried to sit up. He cant.

"Lilin?! Give me a hand here."

"Why?!"

"Why?! Because I'm stuck!!! Now give me a hand!" Lilin went over to his brother. She can't hold onto Kou. He was perfectly fitted in his own impression not one limb or leg was stuck out for Lilin to hold onto. So she settled on pulling him by his jacket.

"Wait brother……. I'll get you of there in a jiffy!!!" She said as she pulled hard. RIIIIIIP……….. Kou's jacket broke loose.

"Oooops…… Sorrry!!1 Next time, I'll really get you out." Lilin got a hold of Kou's pants.

"Uhhhh……. Lilin Nooooo……. I don't think it's such a good…….."

"One, two, three!!!" Lilin gaily said as she pulled with all her might Kou's pants. RRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIP. 

"Wahahhaha…….. I thought I'd never see Mr. Smiley, happy, happy again!!!" Goku laughed as he stuffed himself full of buns.

"Shut up!" Kou screamed as Lilin tried to get a hold of his boxers.

"Don't worry brother… I'll………."

"Stooooop!!!!!!!!!!!! Just call Yaone and Doku to get me out of here!!!" Lilin pouted.

"You don't trust me?"

"No." Kou simply said. Lilin just huffed but went away nonetheless. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Oi! Kou still okay?" Goku poked him in the ribs while he was kneeling in the mud pit.

"Okay?! Okay?!  Of course not! Do you think Lying in my won impression, getting stuck is OKAY?!" He screamed back hysterically. Spit flew into Goku's face,

"Geez….. I was just trying to be nice to you. And besides you don't have to shower me with………"

"I now! Specks of spit!!! Now shut up and leave me alone!!!!!!!!!!" Kou said. He blushed the color of his hair nonetheless._ He would've turned his head away but as I've told before he's a prefect fit to his impression……………. I said to myself as I repressed a chuckle._

Well, if you're wondering why Kou is stuck to mud………. Remember the time I snuck out? You know the episode of the curtain of dust? Well, I went to the place where his impression was and voila!!!!!! I poured the stick-for-all-occasions-and-kinds glue in the pit. It said it could glue everything from mud to humans to youkai. _Therefore, Kougaiji+super-formula-glue+mud = STUCKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!! Ohohohohohoh_……….

After three hours Yaone, Doku and Lilin appeared. 

"Kougaiji-sama!! What happened to you?" Yaone shrieked as she hustled over to where Kougaiji was and dropped to her knees, fussing over him like a schoolgirl.

"Yeah, what happened to you?!" Doku asked while trying to repress a chuckle. Even he can help laughing because while Yaone was trying her best to bring Kou out, Kou seems to be sinking and more stuck than ever.

"Stop laughing Doku! I swear if I got out here…….." His threat seems to fuel Doku's laugh further……..

"That's a pretty big IF!!! Hahahaha………"

"Dokugakuji!!! I would appreciate it if you stop laughing and give me a little help here!" Yaone screeched as she stood up glared death at Doku and placed her hands on her waist. Doku shook his head trying to stop but when he came near……..

"Hahahaha…… Kou…….. I didn't know you still wear that thing……… Hahahaha" Kougaiji became more redder than a tomato.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP OR ELSE…………………." Kougaiji yelled. Doku sensed Kougaiji was serious so he stopped and helped Yaone. Kougaiji was mumbling vanities all the time since the two can't really get him out.

_Woow….. That was one super effective glue!!!! Finally, they brought out two shovels and started digging. They brought impression of the mud and Kougaiji and all with them._

"Damn it!! Cant you really get me out of here?!" Kou almost crying.

"I'm afraid not, Kougaiji-sama……. We'll need some of my  potions and drug to have that mixture softened………."

"What the fuck…………."

"You don't have any choice Kou." Doku said seriously.

"Yeah, big brother. Don't worry Yaone-chan is great!" Lilin sang happily as they loaded Kou and mud on the Hiryu and flew away.

I can't see it, but my eyes are gleaming with: VICTORY.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: 

Max*Sieghart – wow….. You like rave? Well, me too!! I love it!!! All the characters there are cool and it's so funny ne? I like Musica the best….. Which one is your favorite? Hehehe….. so you're going to write in beyblade…… I'm afraid I can't read it coz I don't know a thing about it…….. But so glad that you're still writing!

Gallatica – hey! I'm happy you found it so funny! I'm not really sure that It's funny enough……

AznSage – Hehehe……. Hoped you liked what Sanzo did here to Kou! Don't worry about Gojyo…. He'll get his turn!!  *grins evilly*

Hirame – Hmmmm……. No Kou doesn't have a thing for Goku…… I think I'll make all of the characters here not really attracted to Goku…… Oh you know… to really highlight that Sanzo is delusional and all. *grins*

Star-chan – don't worry about not reviewing the front chapters….. At least you reviewed the last one and that made m know you read it! And I'm glad you liked my fic!

Chris – Hey! I did continue but it's not soon ne? But I hope it's still okay with you……. I mean thinking of another antique of Sanzo's really takes time!!! J *Grins*


	5. Calm before the storm

Calm before the Storm

A/N:  (more like a warning!) if you're not in the mood for stupid, mindless, crappy chapters, just skip reading this……. It's just a stupid idea that popped and can't resist writing it. Besides without all the crap I've written…… it would just be a one paragraph chapter…. Hehehe…. Read at your risk!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Some stupid narrator's narration. (x_x)

Two pair of eyes was watching the scene unfold before them. They were behind the bushes where they could spy without being spotted. It's the perfect place with the perfect view. They wouldn't be in any other place, even if this spot is the absolute worst place anybody could be in. Bless their wonderful hearts. *sighs*

Oh sure, some of you probably know this already but……. To tell you the truth…… Ummm, it's kind of a secret so could you come a little closer? No much closer….. Okay. Here goes, they would rather fight gazillions of youkai and be killed in the process than handle mishaps such as bad odor, you see, its due to the stinking pile of gift some animal left near the vicinity of their hiding haven.

 Or some stupid biting ants, and if you ask me they look a little bigger than what they are supposed to be……. And look at those teeth!!! Aren't they supposed to be undetectable by the naked eye or something like that? Ewwww….. So do you think they might be ants from outer space or something?  Well back to them, if you could only see those two lads now, you'd think they have such nice rosy complexion. But think again. It's all because they're all covered with those horrible ant bites. 

But due to some inexplicable, undesirable and unnatural turn of events..... They had to sink low. Snoop, hide in disgusting places…….. Suffer in the overrated little stuffs such as. Oh, where gone the days of fighting? Oh where?!!!

Anyways…… Back to what I was saying……. At the bushes did those two hid. Spying on a certain violet-eyed buozo, a golden –eyed saru and a crimson haired demon prince. Watched the two youkais fight, watched the buozo's weird movements. Analyzed each and everything that happened and all sorts of stuff the detectives would do. 

Now look far across the field. Yes I'm pointing at the bushes. See that? Oooh…. Now did you see that? Yes that. That pair of glinting red eyes? The ones, which even from this far is sparkling with triumph? Well...... He's trying to make a point. Trying to make that emerald eyed bro...... Bla....... What _the hell is that hair color?!! Damn them... trying to hide in the bushes!!! How can a narrator describe the scene nicely if they're hiding! *grumbles*_

*Stalks at author* Hey! When you said I'd be narrating this, this piece of crap it'll be a piece of cake? How come I'm at a loss of words? How come? If you had just put them in plain sight!!! Gosh….. what were you thinking putting them behind the bush where I can't see them? Are you thinking about me at all? What becomes of my reputation as a narrator? You think other authors would hire me if I'm not descriptive enough? You think?!!! Well speak up!!!

*Aki Rei hushes the narrator* _First of all, it wouldn't be called snooping or spying if they were in plain sight. The idea is for them not to be spotted okay?! *Huffs at narrator*_

_Secondly…… That's what I'm here for. Tell you what…… You can't describe or tell or narrate something tell me and I'll answer for ya. Really? *Narrator looks like a hopeful puppy*__ Yep. So go on and back to the story. *Aki Rei pats head of the puppy…… ughh…. The narrator*  _

Oh. Excuse me. You seem to be still listening..... Or rather reading...... Anyway. Sorry for the slight inconvenience but it looks like I wont be giving you enough details about those two nincompoops hiding in the bushes. Unless…. You're willing for me to ask the dear author once in awhile……. *looks at the audience* *audience nods furiously* Thanks so much. You're such nice readers!!!!! *cries like a little child* So anyway, I'll try best as I can, ok? Now, where was I?

What? Could you speak a little louder? What?! Ah…… Oh yeah..... The red eyed lad is trying to make a point! A point! And a strong one at that!!! It's well..... Ahhh…….It's...... Ahhh..… He's actually....... *confused* Oh cool. I forgot. Wait a moment dear readers........ *whispers at Aki Rei* What is that crimson eyed youth trying to prove anyway? *Aki Rei whispers back* *Narrator furiously nodding*

Ok. I see. *turns back attention to the readers* Readers? Still here? Good, good. Now back to what I was saying...... That red eyed lad is trying to make the green eyed guy understand that he's not paranoid about being close to that Goku lad. That he's right about being scared with the saru. Because everyone will get hurt if they get close with him. But it's not the saru's fault.

Look closely at the bushes. See that moving leaf? Yeah.... that's near the head of the green eyed....... whoooo-hoooo..... Just got a clear view! He's a bishie! See that too? Yeah?! You too? Well good thing the bush has moved!! You could clearly see the face!!! *Aki Rei nudges at the narrator*

What? Oh yeah. Forgot. Got to narrate and all that crap. Well as I was saying, because of our lucky fortune we get to see that face of the green eyed guy who turned out to be Cho Hakkai!!! *Clears throat* The bush has moved aside and has revealed the gorgeous, the handsome, the……. *Aki Rei nudges at narrator one more time* Ok! Fine!!! He's really cute you know?

The bush has moved aside because the crimson eyed lad has got him in the shoulders and was shaking him roughly. If you strain your ears…… you could hear them arguing. So you going to strain your ears with me? Okay, here we go……

"Hakkai!!! Are you watching with your eyes closed?!!!"

"Of course not!! It just doesn't make sense!"

"What's not making sense?! It so full of sense, I'm getting sick of the word sense!!!!"

"I just don't see why Sanzo would do that to me. He knows I'm not infatuated or anything at Goku! He knows that Goku is just a little brother to me!!" *Narrator's sharp eyes see something*

Pssst….. Sorry to interrupt you, but did you see how Cho Hakkai shuddered?!!! He still has the trauma it seems!!! And did you see the look of pure terror in his emerald orbs? Scary. Hey don't get all mad at me. We could still listen in on them. I paused them for awhile so we still get to hear every word…….. *Pushes play button once again*

"Sanzo's paranoid, a schizo at the most…… he thinks that everybody who's getting near to that saru is out to take him away from him……. See how he even creamed Kougaiji without the later knowing it? The same happened to you!!! For godsakes!!!" The man threw his arms tiredly. Cho Hakkai seems to be nodding.

"Fine. But I still need more proof."

"Proof?! What the……." Cho Hakkai cut the man short.

"Gojyo please. I may know, if I do convince myself to believe you, that Sanzo is the one doing this but……. I'm still……." *Narrator sees a fanged grin even from afar*

"Still scared of Goku?" Nodding.

"We need to be with them. I promise I'll give you more proof and protection from the buozo."

"Promise?"

"Promise." *Narrator brings attention back to him*

Ahem. Glad that you still have interest on me…… Anyways, *an eye shining with excitement, the way it does when there is gossip* Did you guys notice how tender Gojyo was with Hakkai……. Ooooh…. How sweet, vowing to protect him and all that crap….. I do hope they get together!! *squeals at author's feet*

Please!! Get them together!!! Please!!! *author seems to be nodding since narrator is back on track and happy* 

Yaay!!! Anyway guys….. this chap is about to be concluded. Let me review you of the facts….. ehhh….. the events.

1. Hakkai and Gojyo snooping at the damned bush.

2. Hakkai and Gojyo suffering from stinking gifts and ant bites.

3. Gojyo trying to make Hakkai realize that Sanzo is the cause of the entire ruckus and the one who ultimately gave him his trauma.

4. Narrator gets a peek of Hakkai and drools.

5. Sneak prehear (as opposed to preview! :) of their arguments.

6. And lastly……. I haven't said this but….. The two went happily back to the waiting buozo and saru knowing grins on their faces….. If you had been straining still….. Gojyo had muttered to Hakkai's ear to act cool. You know…. So that the buozo won't suspect a thing.

End of Chapter.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: 

Narrator – I did a good job didn't I? *grins proudly*

Aki Rei - *grumbles* stupidest, most irritating, know-nothing narrators……..

Narrator – what? You saying something?

Aki Rei – No. *hands narrator a couple of coins* I paid so now. GO AWAY.

Narrator – ch. Fine. I would have done better if there's more money.

Aki Rei- and that's one thing I don't have! *looks at narrator's retreating back*

Aki Rei - *shakes head* authors out there……. Don't hire this nameless narrator. He's full of crap and can't even narrate decently!! I swear......... 


	6. watch out, Homura!

Chapter 5

A/N: Very sorry about the last chap…. Loose screws running loose. Anyway, I fired the pathetic narrator and he won't be easily accepted for anther job again. As always, I'll extract all those I can read from Sanzo's dirty ole mind!!! (Hehehehe….. Hope I really do, well I do try the best I can!) So on with the real story!

Sanzo's POV

I was just thinking of several ways on how to celebrate my victory over Kougaiji, like maybe having a picnic with Goku using my extra food rations or maybe by drooling over Goku in peace, but my good mood and marvelous planning bid goodbye as soon as I spotted two unwelcome figures in sight.

The kappa and the cook, whom I had desperately wished wouldn't show up ever again, were striding towards us, a jaunty wave in their arms. To my envy, the near brooding saru suddenly perked up and ran towards them as quick as he can.

 Well yes, near brooding, since I wouldn't talk to him even if he was beside himself with the silence that hung around us like a thick fog. You might be thinking, what a waste!! You know me having the saru all to myself and doing nothing about it. I know. Damn my pride. I could definitely use some humble bone in my body.

I let out a steamy breath. I'm currently using all the patience and understanding I have in me to stop myself from extracting Goku from the kappa who had him in a tight bear hug. To my surprise and anger the kappa looked at me and winked. I glared daggers at him till he looked away grinning from ear to ear. Well, so much for me winning the glaring competition. Oh, the mysterious ways a kappa's brain worked!!

Then finally before I flipped over the hugging thingy he let go of Goku. Finally!! I was really starting to think he wouldn't let go! I mean, come on! They were only gone for what?! A few measly hours!!! And he's acting as if they were gone for about a year!!

The saru on the other hand was oblivious to Gojyo's true motives. Well what could it be?! Brotherly hug? Brother my ass!! I know he has the eye on Goku forever. Well, if you don't believe me, I have proof to believe that he had the thing on the saru.

Hello!! We've been traveling for what? Months? Years maybe…. I've lost count, but I'm sure all those accidental brushes of touch, the headlock thingie he does when he's quite 'angry', the concern he shows when the saru is lost (although he insists on the excuse that without Goku we won't be able to play mahjongg anymore) and the lame excuse of fighting with him on food (he does this so he can have a bout of petty fighting with him which of course results to more 'accidental' touches!!), are definitely not accidental. I've had what? Months? Years? To observe them. And if you don't believe that with all the time I have to observe them and to have concluded rightly, then I suggest you go out of my head and be gone!!! I'm letting you read all my thoughts and you won't believe me? Hmmp.

Some still here? Aright. But let's move on. Gojyo will definitely have his time. Just he wait. The saru was looking at Hakkai closely, as if examining him if it's okay to get close to him or whatever. The cook smiled and opened his arms for a hug, which Goku gladly accepted. I would've expected that Hakkai still has the trauma. 

Maybe the 'punishment' or 'tricks' if you will, that I gave him were a little too mild for him. And I thought that I've done enough mischief on him to damage him for at least….. let's say, a year? But look at him now. It seems as if nothing happened to him!!! And look!!! He's even looking at me, _smiling!!!_

I swear, if I didn't know better, that this two knew nothing about my obsession, I would've have entertained the thought that they're teasing me, provoking me.

I tried best as I can to ignore them. After all I didn't want them to know about it. I know I've been careful, but in this world you can never say that you've been _too_ careful!! So I turned my back to them and adopted a calm posture as I leaned against the tree. But I'm listening closely to every word they're saying. As I said, you can't be _too careful._

"What took you so long?" I hear Goku say. Obviously it was meant for Hakkai. He only reserves his childish, hurt voice towards Hakkai. Oh you know, when he begs for more rations or whatever childish things he does.

"Uhhh, we got lost." Hakkai stammered apprehensively.

"Lost? I thought you had a great sense of direction." Goku asked confused. Because the cook suddenly became at a loss for words the kappa answered for him.

"He's with me. I kept confusing him with the direction." He said breezily as I saw, out of the corner of my eye, him get a cigarette out of his pocket.

"Hah! I should've known!! You're enough to get lost in a small house!" I smiled at the occasional cunning of _my_ saru.

"What?! Come here and I'll show you how directionally challenged you are!!" The two ran around in circles, Goku gleefully did so while Gojyo was acting as if he was mad, and they came by me as they did so, and to my surprise, Gojyo winked at me again like he's teasing me, provoking me. I was reaching boiling point but I didn't bulge. If I get angry, if they find out about my obsession, I am good as lost. So I steamed in peace. _He'll get his time, I swear._

As soon as they reached Hakkai, Gojyo stopped running but Goku kept running towards the woods sticking his tongue out at Gojyo who did the same.

"You're getting old kappa!!!" Goku yelled back. He stopped at the entrance of the woods, dancing his little dance which was meant to irritate the kappa.

"No. I'm not old. You're just too childish for my tastes." Gojyo said dismissively at the saru as he puffed ringfuls of smoke and draped an arm across Hakkai's shoulders. Goku pouted. 

"Oi, bouzo!! Your pet looks disappointed….." Gojyo called in my direction.

"So?!" I said lazily. 

"Don't you want to comfort him or something?" The kappa asked as he dropped a step beside me and offered me a smoke. I declined and glared at him.

"None of your damned business." I said as icily as, so as to stop myself hitting him silly with my harisen.

"Sure about that? But weren't you just……… OI!!!" Gojyo stopped mid sentence as we both spotted Homura at the same time. He was clutching Goku around the shoulders and his sword was dragged across the saru's neck. Hakkai was half way to them when Homura warned him not to go any closer.

"Get any closer and Goku goes….. Poof!" He eyed me menacingly.

"Konzen. No Sanzo. If you want him back and _alive_…… you know where to find me. Don't bring them." He said as he motioned towards Hakkai and Gojyo. Then with a flick of his free hand they vanished out of sight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"If you weren't so damn nosy, asking me silly questions, Goku might never be kidnapped!!" I raged at Gojyo who has stood stock still in the same position he had when the kami left with my pet in tow. Gojyo regained consciousness and looked angrily at me.

"Look, buozo!! Is it my fault that I just want to talk to you? And am I supposed to know that the blasted kami will show up today?" He rounded up on me looking deadly. Well, sorry mister kappa, I'm not that easy to intimidate!! I glared daggers at him but did not otherwise show him that I knew he had a point.

"Sanzo, Gojyo, I think this is not the time to fight. Our enemy is Homura. Not amongst ourselves." Hakkai said as turned pleading eyes towards Gojyo.

They looked at each other with an expression I could not read, was it mutual understanding? Or was it anxiousness? I did not ponder long; I have more pressing matters at hand than wringing my head out trying to figure out what they are doing.

"I'm going." I said shortly as I went up to the jeep to get a few items. I heard scuffling steps behind me and when I turned, I found the both of them looking at me disapprovingly.

"Sanzo, clearly you are not thinking…?"

"If you think I'm going alone, that is to say, _without _you, well yes, I'm going to." I put a hand out to shove them aside and started stalking towards the general direction of where Homura told me on where he'd be.

"Be reasonable buozo!! Do you think you can handle that kami all alone?" I hurtled back at them, my eyes ablaze.

"Oh yes I can. And don't you dare follow me or you'll be dead meat!!!" I said with much conviction that they have taken a step back or two. Satisfied that they won't meddle anymore, I set off, my mind clicking over time for ways to get back at Homura.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Are we really going to let him set off all alone?" Hakkai asked Gojyo in a small voice.

"Of course not. The buozo…. They _both_ might get hurt….."

"I know. But Sanzo said…."

"Well, Sanzo isn't here. And besides he wouldn't know if we followed him."

"You're right." Hakkai said resignedly as he sighed and patted Hakuryu who turned like his usual self and had already perched himself atop his master's shoulders.

"Yeah I'm right. Besides, I got a plan." Gojyo said a mad twinkle in his crimson eyes.

"Why do I have a feeling I won't like this?" The green eyed man groaned. 

"Oh come on. We observe Sanzo. You know, to prove that he…..?"

"Yeah…."

"But when he need or help we jump in, okay?"

"Well of course."

"But….." Gojyo said as he puffed a smoke and turned towards the sinking sun, his eyes full of expectations as it caught the light.

"What?"

"I don't think Sanzo'll need our help."

"Why?" Hakkai asked dumbfounded. Gojyo shook his head in wonder. Hakkai can be so smart and knowledgeable about everything, but when it comes to love and other thing that really counts, in Gojyo's opinion anyway, he's completely clueless.

"Because….." The kappa said with as much patience that a kindergarten teacher has over her students.

"A love sick fool won't be very easy to defeat. Its mind works in wonders a world could not explain." Hakkai still looked dumb. Gojyo sighed.

"Let's put it this way: The more he becomes envious, the more he becomes dangerous." And Hakkai finally understood.

t.b.c

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: 

kitsune_me: finally!! I updated it!! Yey!! I guess I'll finish it in 3 or more chaps. Homura'll be the last one and I've got special plans for Gojyo. What else? Hmmm… do mention something else in your review other than my grammatical errors okay? Hehehehe……


	7. Homura

Chapter 6

Sanzo's POV

I could've sworn that Homura's hideaway was much closer than this. I've been traveling since dawn and I'm sure that I'm not even half way through. I've passed this desert-like place already (which was sweltering hot!! I'm just glad I passed it mid morning… I'd hate think on what would happen to me if passed that damned place when the sun is high), then there was this town I had to go (which made a fuss of me… Yes, another place a previous Sanzo had visited!! _Oh the pains…_) and lastly this wide river I had to cross… (Would you believe it?!! It caused my robes to get fucking wet!! Fortunately for me, I had multi purpose robes and beneath its billows I found another pair. _Lucky, lucky…) _

_And it's nearly noon now, I said to myself as I raised my hand to shield my eyes from the harsh sun light and wiped my sweaty brow. I'm now in a forest and had accumulated numerous scratches in my face and arms due to the thick brushes of plants I had to go through._

But then again, I thought to myself, the last time I went there, I was riding Hakuryu and Hakkai was driving like mad. Unfortunately, because of my stubbornness, I've left them behind. I didn't even stop to think of borrowing Hakuryu for a ride!! Hmmm… I don't think Hakuryu would go with me alone though. I distinctly remember hearing Hakkai say that Hakuryu won't let others drive him.

I trudged a sloppy uphill and cursed. First, Homura takes _my Goku away and now he's making me very, very tired. And _no one_ makes Sanzo tired, _no one_. Tens of thousands of youkais didn't make me. _Why shouldn't Homura be the same_?_

I reached a clearing and noticed that across it, stood the former palace of Kougaiji. I smirked._ It seems that I have good memory. I said to myself as I admitted that indeed Homura's place is closer than I exaggerated it to be. _

My eyes glinted from behind my place behind the bushes, bidding Homura an early goodbye.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Goku's POV

I was jolted awake when pin pricks of red attacked my closed lids. I pried open my eyes but was blinded by the harsh sun light streaming directly at me from the only window of the room.

I looked around the place to find out where I am. To my dismay, I found myself exactly at the place I least wanted to be. _And I thought I'll never see this goddamn awful place again! I said to myself irritated. _

Until the last possible minute, when I was jolted awake and was immediately aware that my hands are up above my head and was probably secured by metal chains and felt the cool, solid, rough wall behind my back, I was hoping that I'd dreamed the whole episode that Homura had gotten me again.

I sighed loudly while inside I was berating myself for my stupidity. _Why the hell didn't I break free from Homura's grasp_…? Not bragging but I have enough power to fight him off. But what did I do? I froze and let Homura do whatever he so desires._ Fuck me and my monkey brain._

I immediately tensed when I heard the tip taps of footsteps. I looked up to see…. _Guess who_? Yup, Homura and his two flunkies. 

"Yo, Homura! Nice of you to invite me here." I spat sarcastically at him.

"I would watch my mouth if I were you." Homura said threateningly as he made low deliberate steps towards me. 

"Tell me… Why did you bring me here _again? To persuade me to join you__ again?__ I'm sorry but I don't think…"_

"_That_ is not the reason I brought you here." Homura said menacingly as he took the few steps to close the distance between us.

"The reason?" Homura asked Zenon not me. Zenon smirked as he and Shien exchanged meaningful looks.

"Homura wants Konzen broken." He said half laughing. He thought what he said was amusing. I didn't think so.

"If you want _Sanzo_, then why'd you kidnap me? Why not Sanzo?" I asked confused. And I thought I was dumb, well I just met someone dumber!! _Yay!!_

"It's not enough for Homura to kill Sanzo. There are other ways of breaking far more effective than death." Shien said patiently, as if afraid that if he goes any faster, I won't get a thing he's saying. Which is right of course. _Duh?_

"So you get me instead! That puts two and two together, really!!" I said sarcastically. Okay, given there are other ways… _What do I have to do with all of it? _

"My, my you're as innocent as always, aren't we Son Goku?" Homura chided as he turned his attention on me once again, satisfied with the two flunkies' participation. 

"No, I'm not!! You're just dumb!!! I don't have anything to do with this!!" I said as I tried vainly to break from the restraining chains.

"Tsk. Tsk. Well, if I can't explain it… I just have to show you myself…" He said menacingly as he raised his hand to touch the chains restraining my hand.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sanzo's POV

_Grrr…. Show it to you myself, my ass!!!! I gritted to myself as I continued to watch the scene before me. Homura's making me royally pissed big time. Good thing, I went here early and laid the plans… But even so, even if I know that I'll get him for this, I can't help getting irritated about his smugness. If only he knew I had the upper hand._

I hitched myself higher upon the ridges of the side of Homura's castle. I really don't see the logic of putting a window so high… Well, okay I see the logic, it's supposed to be a dungeon of some kind and they had to place the window to its highest possible extent to lessen the 'prisoners' route to freedom, but damn!!! It's just a little hard and a very uncomfortable place to snoop!!! 

My aching tendons and hands are getting to its toll from hanging on to dear life at the wall and only the adrenaline, the jealous attack and rush are keeping me here. I squinted my eyes to see what's happening next. 

I gasped when I saw Homura advancing on _my Goku, pure lust on his face. My head boiled and blood came rushing to my cheeks in rage, causing me to stumble a little on my precarious position. I righted myself and breathed hard, forcefully claming myself down. __Easy, Sanzo… You know perfectly well that that blasted kami won't ever lay a finger on your Goku. You had that covered. I said to myself as I anticipated my state of the art mischief._

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Goku's POV

I closed my eyes when I finally got what Homura was up to… But then he might be just joking right? He must be pulling my leg… Yeah, that's it… He's just playing a joke.

"Ne, Homura… You're just joking right?" I said as my voice broke. I sounded like I was whimpering and goddamit!! Since when have I been so scared? I berated myself as I saw Shien and Zenon laugh at my pitiful form.

"I guess not…" Homura said menacingly as he brought his hand to touch the metal chains… When…

"OWWWW……" Homura was blasted 10 feet away when he touched the chains. My eyes widened. _I must really have good luck_!!! Shien and Zenon gasped, obviously surprised. Homura on the other hand who was spread eagled on the floor was livid.

"Shien, Zenon!! What happened?!!" He thundered as he tried to stand up… only to fall down when his feet got tangled in his own chains 

"Uhh… you were blasted away?"

"I know!! Do I look stupid!! Check him out!!" Homura said angrily as he tried to stand up but ended falling again as he tripped over his own chains.

"Hehehehe…" I laughed to myself as Homura reddened even more. Shien and Zenon were looking at him too and they had huge smiles on their faces.

"What re you smiling at?!!! Didn't I say go check on him?!!" He bellowed angrily as he finally managed to stand up. Shien and Zenon shook their heads still smiling. They went to me and touched the chains then… BLASSSTTT!!!

Shien and Zenon were blasted away too and landed near Homura's feet. It was time of Homura to smile.

"Huh!! So what is it?" He asked them eyeing me and the chains.

"Looks like it has electricity, uh, very high electricity surging to it." Shien said as he smoothed his robes and stood up, offering his hand to Zenon as he did so.

"Electricity?!! How?!!" Homura asked Shien as his eyes went wide as saucers.

"You tell us. You're the one tinkering around in this dungeon." Zenon snorted as he reached for his pocket for a smoke.

"Are you telling me that I did that?" Homura raged as he took Zenon by the collar.

"No. I'm telling you that we don't have a fucking clue on why that fucking chain is tampered, okay?" 

"Fine. Then I think you're going to tell us why that chain is tampered." Homura said as he turned his attention back at me.

"How the hell should I know?" I said.

"If you're not going to tell us… then I have to force it out of you!!!" Homura said angrily as he strode towards me when…. POOOOT…

Homura stopped walking and looked as red as a tomato. I froze for awhile before dawning on me what happened.

"Woooow…. That was some mighty fart Homura!!!" I said as I collapsed in a fit of giggles. Shien and Zenon looked at each other before sinking down to their knees, banging the stone floor with their fists and rolling with laughter.

"Ahahahahaha….. Homura…. Ahahahahaha…." The two laughed uproariously.

"Hehehehe… you know what? You beat Gojyo's hands down!!! Wahahahahahaha…." I laughed. It was hard. I wanted to clutch my aching tummy but I can't. Tears rolled down my face as I laughed harder when Homura looked redder in the face.

I raised my head to laugh harder when I saw something moving from the window… Looks like Sanzo… I tilted my head to squint against the harsh sunlight but was distracted when…. POOOOOT!!!!

"Homura…. Ahahaha, If you need to get in, Ahahaha…. the bathroom… Don't be so shy!!! Ahahha…" I squeezed the word out as me, Shien and Zenon laughed even louer.

"URUSAI!!!" Homura screamed. But for all its worth, he sounded like he was whispering.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sanzo's POV

Damn!! That was close. I thought Goku has spotted me… Hmmm… But then it was worth the peek!! _Hehehe__… Good thing I'm good at making noises! I said to myself satisfied._

_But Homura, it's just for starters… Wait till you see the rest._

t.b.c


	8. Homura part2

Chapter 7

Gojyo's POV

Out of curiosity and for other certain uses and references, we followed Sanzo. And I really have to give the buozo a credit after all the things I've witnessed him do. For one, he really did go through all the 'I'll swim 'cross the ocean and go over the hills for you' crap. Literally. I mean cross the sweltering hot dessert and waddle on a freezing river? Geez.

It was such a shame though, that Hakuryu hadn't been put to good use. Hakkai had presumed that Sanzo will have a bigger chance noticing that someone was following him if we had used a vehicle. I grudgingly agreed. So with much complaining and half hearted threats of quitting, we followed Sanzo and did pretty much what he did. I was broken out of my reverie when Hakkai gasped beside me none too softly.

"Oh! Look out!" Hakkai said under his breath as he clawed at his cheeks in worry, barely suppressing himself from running out again. I had warned him earlier about getting all loud and jumpy. If the buozo finds out that we had disobeyed his 'request', we'll all be dead meat before we can say 'we're sorry'. 

So anyway, the first time Sanzo almost fell Hakkai had jumped from the thick brush of plants and ran towards the castle intent on catching the buozo should he fall. I pulled him out of view just in time. Thankfully, the buozo didn't hear Hakkai's yelling as he was preoccupied in getting himself upright again. 

I turn just in time to see Sanzo slip from his position and was now dangling with one hand clamped firmly on the ledge. I smile encouragingly at Hakkai.

"Don't worry; he's got a firm grip." Hakkai nodded absently, although his concern was evident in his face. I stop the urge to sigh. Hakkai is obviously in the mother hen mode. It would take him awhile to switch back to normal mode. 

After a few moments of struggle, Sanzo finally made himself comfortable on the side of the castle.

"See? I told you." Hakkai turned to me, a not so amused expression on his face. 

"I really think we should help him." 

"No. He can handle it himself. 'Sides we aren't allowed to be here in the first place." Hakkai sighed as he turned back to watching Sanzo again.

"You're right. But I thought we are here to _examine_ his actions?" He asked me surly.

"Well yeah… But do you really think that sharing a window to snoop on with Sanzo is a good idea?" I asked him sarcastically.

"But, but… What should we do? We're just wasting time here!" Hakkai said exasperatedly. I sigh again for the umpteenth time. _Well duh! I've told him about a hundred times already that we should find a suitable place for viewing the inside and the outside of the castle! But what did he say_?! 'Sanzo might fall! We should watch him!'

And so we stayed here, wasting precious moments when we could have known what caused the golden haired monk to laugh his ass off and what could have caused him to loose his footing. 

Instead of answering Hakkai's question, I strode towards the direction of the castle, careful to pick the path that will successfully obscure us from Sanzo's eagle eyes. Not that he had much use of those anyways. I mean on us. His eyes are pretty much trained to somewhere on the inside of the dungeon. I hear a pitter patter of footsteps from behind followed by a hiss.

"Why'd you left so suddenly?" Hakkai asked as he dropped beside me in a few quick strides. Tired of the worry-wart mother hen, I kept my mouth shut and continued on trudging to the hole in the wall of the castle I so conveniently spotted while Hakkai kept going on and on about the welfare of some worldly buozo.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Oh my…"

"What? What happened?!" 

"Uh-oh…"

"Hey!! What's going on?!!"

"Ooops… So don't want to be him…"

"Why?! What's happening?!"

"Ahahahahaha!!!" I laughed my heart out as I saw something so terribly funny and so terribly disturbing at the same time._ How can green bubbles come from his mouth_?! _So, so, so funny_!!!_ Hahahaha_…

I could have dropped to my knees and rolled on the ground uproariously from the onslaught of my laughter when something hit the back of my skull… HARD!!

"Itai!!" I said as I nursed my battered head and the laugh died down on my throat replaced by pathetic whimpering. I looked up to see Hakkai looking down on me with an annoyed gleam in his green eyes.

"Why'd you do that for?" I asked him, feeling hurt.

"Isn't it obvious?!" Hakkai asked me, his voice rising an octave._ Hmmm… He's probably irritated at me_. _I wonder why though_…  I asked myself as I continued rubbing that sore spot in my head.

"What?" I asked Hakkai when he still hadn't said a word and just continued to glare at me like I was the worst koi in the whole universe. The monocled one just shook his head in exasperation and rolled his eyes. Without another glance at me he strode towards _my_ snooping area and proceeded to peer inside.

My pride in shreds and my head throbbing in pain I trudged up next to him and pouted.

"That was low, Hakkai." Hakkai cast me a brief glare before peering in again.

"Hn. What you did earlier was low too." He said in a low voice that made me think that I really had made him upset with something.

"What? What did I do?"

"If you can't figure that out then, you'll…" Hakkai stopped in mid sentence as he sputtered. 

"What?" The sputter turned out into full blown laughter and before I know it, the always collected and fair mannered man had rolled to ground clutching at his stomach and was laughing madly.

"What?" When Hakkai didn't answer... Obviously he can't, _Duh_… I peered inside and within moments had joined Hakkai down the ground, laughing my guts out. When the laughter subsided, I caught Hakkai's eye.  

"Sanzo's a genius!!!" We exclaimed both at the same time and erupted in to fresh peals of laughter.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Goku's POV

_Oh my god! I can't believe that Homura could be such a riot_!! I said to myself as I watch the current fighting god fight down the impulse to turn me, Shien and Zenon into a blistering pile of ashes. If only looks could kill the three of us would be long gone. I swear the three of us have such luck to be still alive and kicking.

But hey!! How can you blame us?! I mean if you could just hear that ear-blasting fart and the look on his face when he vaulted ten feet and landed ungraciously on his behind, you'd be laughing your arse too!!! And look, Shien – THE Shien who had never broken into a smile since I saw him was laughing like his life depended on it. Can you believe it?! 

All in all, it was great!! I mean the experience, wow!! And the entertainment - mind blowing !! And I really don't know if prisoners such as myself should be glad that they are caught… But I am!! If Homura hadn't acted like a stupid prick and kidnapped me to get back on 'Konzen' I wouldn't be here, happier than I've ever been. _If only I could clutch my stomach and roll on the ground too_. I said my mood blackening as I stared envyingly as Shien and Zenon who was free to do so.

"Will you stop laughing?!" Homura said angrily as he straightened himself and glared daggers at his companions.

"Sorry, Homura…" Shien said as he wiped the remnants of the happy tears from his eyes and tried vainly to control himself. Zenon stood up awhile later, already composed.

"So, entertaining us is done? Damn and I was looking forward for more too!!" He slyly asked Homura. The fighting god glowered, the look in his eyes made the teasing Zenon stop.

"Are you done yet?!" Homura asked the two flunkies on his side.

"Yeah. But I had to admit that has got to be the best time in like… A few thousand years!!" Zenon cheekily grinned at Homura who in turn narrowed his eyes.

"I believe there is some task outside waiting for your attendance." Homura all but growled in a very low and threatening voice. Unfortunately, the cheeky god hadn't caught on fast.

"What?! But all the fun's here…" Zenon stopped as he noticed the murderous glare in the fighting god's eyes. Not too mention that he was glowing around the edges too, meaning if Zenon didn't comply fast, Homura would definitely throw all his planning to the wind and kill his companion on the spot.

"Like I said, ready to go!" Zenon added hastily as Homura turned to face me again. I forced myself to pout.

"What? Fun's over? And here I thought you're being a good host."

"Shut up, saru!" Homura snapped. _Ooh… Someone's mighty mad_… I said to myself as I watch Homura try to calm himself down but failed miserably. And I thought that Homura had patience as long as forever.

"You've made me really mad, Son Goku. Now tell me, how did you rig up the shackles?" I made a face at him.

"Hello!! You brought me here unconscious and you tied me immediately to this wall here. What the hell made you think that I'm the one who rigged this up?" Homura thought for awhile and conceded. _Thank the heavens_!!!

"While you're at it, check the perimeter of the area and find out how the chains been rigged." Homura commanded Shien and Zenon of whom he spotted leaving the dungeon quietly. The two looked at each other and then shrugged. 

"Hey just don't do the fun stuff without us!!" Zenon ducked as a chair, that Homura conveniently spotted somewhere, came whizzing by his head.

"Like I said enjoy!!" Zenon said as the two finally disappeared through the door. I felt panic rising through me. First to set me off was the look in Homura's eye – I saw in them anger and something I can't identify and Zenon's comment… Surely what does 'Enjoy' mean?

"So, what shall we do now?" Homura said as he sat down on the chair that appeared magically out of nowhere, and a table that held on top of it a pitcher of water and two tall empty glasses. He poured himself a drink and drank all of it one gulp. 

I eyed the pitcher of water hungrily. _When had I last eaten_? My stomach growled to alert that it probably had been aeons ago. I could probably eat a whole feast at this rate but under current circumstance, I would and will settle for a glass of water.

"Want some, Son Goku?" I nod my head eagerly. 

"You know all come with a price right?" I nod again. I think hunger warped my brain because I didn't think on what the consequences may bring. All I know is that the pitcher of water is tantalizing, and it's calling me. Homura grinned and poured me a glass. He came over me and placed the glass under my nose.

"Do you want it?"

"Yes!!"

"Well… Here you have… OUCH!! What the fuck?!" Homura's hand jerked and the glass of water came flying out.

"Homura!!" I whined as I watched the glass broke into a million shards on the hard cement floor. I lifted my eyes to find the most impossibly huge spider into Homura's bicep. I could tell it was of an un-normal size since it took all the space in Homura's upper arm. I think Homura blanked out because he froze into his spot and was looking at the spider with glassy eyes with his jaw hanging open. I think the spider might have been mocking him coz the humongous thing just stared defiantly back.

"Oi, Homura? It's just a bug." Goku rolled his eyes as he continued to eye the remaining water on the pitcher. He chanced a look at Homura who was still staring wide eyed at the spider.

"Earth to Homura!! It's just a big – I mean a really, very big – spider!! Wake up!!" I yelled as loud as I could to the still stunned Homura. I think my yelling had an effect since he started to move his mouth - up and down, up and down his jaws goes then suddenly all the loud incomprehensible yelling. 

"GAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" Homura jumped around trying to shake the thing of his arm but the little bugger has such a tight grip, it just wouldn't let go. 

I looked at the scene before me in shock. I couldn't believe it!! Hello, he would?! The revered fighting god is brought down by a spider!! You'd think that he wont have any fears – well, yeah everyone has fears but come on!! Fighting god losing to a teensy, weeny spider?!! It's just unbelievable.

"SHIEN!! ZENON!! Get here this instant!!! A spider is ravaging my arm!! Get it OFFFF!!!!!!" He yelled as he continued to whirl around in utter desperation to fling the spider, but as I said – tight grip. Fully comprehending the scene now I started to laugh and of course, what good would it be if you do not mock your enemy keeping you prison?!

"Gosh, Homura!! When we fight again, remind me to learn of an attack including spiders!!!" 

"Shut up!! Shien, Ze- *blublublublub*" I stared at Homura who's now frothing green bubbles at the mouth!! What an entertainment!!!

"Wahahahahahaha… Homura you really did go to great lengths to entertain me don't you?! Hahahaha… "_ I swear I'm going to die of laughter here!_! I said to myself. My eyes widened for a bit as a wild conclusion came in my head.

_What if Homura's goal is to kill me by laughing?! What if this is all part of his plan?!! I don't want to die yet… But hey, given the credit it's such a blissful way to die. Homura must've thought long and hard of this_. Believing my synopsis, I breathed hard and deep and tried to control my laughter. _If that's really what they wanted to do I won't give them the satisfaction of claiming victory. I will survive this madness! I will_!

Homura's eyes widened to its last possible extent when he realized that he was frothing at the mouth. And he still hadn't rid of the spider which was giving him a major heart attack. And by the way he is convulsing right now he might be really having it.

He dropped to the ground and rolled around trying to squash the poor little bug. But in doing so he entangled himself in his chains making him look like a human pretzel. When he realized his position he started frothing more at the mouth and has completely forgotten about the spider, who I think might have fused with him since it's still in its original position on Homura's arm.   

Shien and Zenon finally arrived and at seeing them Homura frothed more and more bubbles causing the two to freeze their actions. Not really wanting to be at the wrath of their buddy and fighting god, they squashed the laughter bubbling out of them to untangle Homura and to go remove the spider.

And by golly, Shien had to use hypnosis on the spider to get it off!! I think the bug might've glued itself on Homura's arm or it might have fallen in love with Homura that it wouldn't let go, but yeah, hypnosis did the trick on the little bugger.

"Get *blublublublub* Goku out of my *blublublublub* sight!!"

"But Homura, what about your plans?" Shien asked completely dumbfounded by Homura's request. I flinched. _Don't ruin this for me Shien. I really don't want to be kept prisoner here forever with an obviously unbalanced god_!!

"I don't *blublub* give a damn!!! *blublub* Get him out!!!" Homura all but shrieked out as he turned on his heels and went out of the dungeon trailing green bubbles as he went. Shien, Zenon and I winced at the slamming of Homura's door. We chuckled to each other as the two of them unclasped the chains bounding me one with the cold wall.

"Was he always like that?!" I asked them as I rubbed gently at my wrists. I don't know what I'm doing but after sharing this memorable experience with the two of them, it just seemed right that we talk about it.

"No. He's uptight at heart." Zenon said as he rubbed his chin thoughtfully. He really must be thinking or maybe even reflecting on what has happened today. Obviously, this is the first time that Homura had acted that way. From what I gathered, Homura has had a repressed childhood and he really didn't have much happiness in his life.

"Go now, Son Goku. Before Homura changes his mind." Shien said abruptly breaking the befallen silence. I nodded to them and smiled gratefully. The two nodded and promptly vanished. I gathered up my wits first before going on away. This really had been a weird but overall happy experience. _I'd better tell Sanzo of this… Maybe he'll have some ideas on why Homura had acted that way_.

"But Wow. I hope to see another episode of that soon!!" I said to myself aloud as I worked my way out of the dungeon and into Sanzo's waiting arms.

I frowned to myself as I thought of that. _Yeah, it would be nice if indeed Sanzo is worried and would be welcoming me with open arms. For sure, he would strike me with the harisen once I get back_. I said to myself glumly as I reached the outside of the castle.

t.b.c

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


	9. Sanzo explains

Chapter 8

Sanzo's POV

_Take that, you stupid prick!! It serves you right in taking _my_ Goku away from me. And if you ever lay another stinking hand on him, I swear I'll make this incident look like a field trip_.  After having said that to myself in victory rush, I jumped down from the ledge and into the welcomed, solid ground. I don't give a crap that the damned ledge might be three stories up. I have the skills and the guts to do just that. And dammit!!! I just wanted to stretch my aching legs and arms.

_Now if only I can say that to Homura's face – I know it will be more gratifying_. I sighed at the helplessness of being unable to express myself properly in the fighting god's presence. Don't you think that being able to throw it in his face that my genius had left him completely ticked and paranoid fun?! Oh well, some things just don't go your way.

After stretching my hands and arms, I proceeded to lightly stamp my foot to the ground to let the blood start flowing again. _Man!! I didn't know that climbing and maintaining that position in the wall could be more strenuous than fighting a ton of youkai_!! I sighed to myself as I reached for my cigarettes only to find them gone. Then I remembered that I left them sitting quite nicely in Hakuryu's dashboard. _Damn_!!

I growled as I start trudging at the nearest brush of plants. I think that it isn't wise to let Goku know that I'm around here. Sure, he might think that I've come to save him and that would be a plus for me, right?! I mean I've beaten the crap out of Homura – the fighting god Homura – and have also brought home the trophy. But then I've no experience in such things and I might whack him with the harisen in the head instead of being all happy about his 'escape'. And besides I didn't bring Hakkai and Gojyo here so I really don't have much of a room to create excuses should I need them.

On the other hand, Goku is unpredictable. Once in a while the saru does show a spark of brilliance and he might figure out about the green-eyed monster in me. He might be happy to find out that I've 'some' affection for him – even though I act otherwise – but then he might not. I'm not really sure if the affection he's showing me is out of respect or out of something else. But he might also connect the dots and find out that I'm the one who did show 'the-entertaining-side-of-fighting-god-Homura' and the Hakkai incident and the Kougaiji incident and whatever other incidents he had left out.

He might – and I stress the might – be happy with what I did to Homura and maybe possibly Kougaiji but he might not forgive me for doing that to Hakkai. I growled to myself in a sudden fit of jealousy._ Damn, Hakkai!! Grrr… If really didn't need you in this journey, I would've_… I stopped that train of thought, because if the idea has suddenly appealed to me, I might take action.

Anyway, speaking of stupid Hakkai, I just had this gut feeling that Goku would be sore with me if he finds out about that little, 'somewhat' dirty trick with Hakkai. He adores the man like an older brother he never had. So okay, sue me!! Goku might love Hakkai only like a brother, but hell!! Give me some credit here with the thoughts!! As we all know almost all love affairs start with friendship - what if Goku suddenly decided that he just didn't love Hakkai like brother, what if he develops something else?! What if…?!

Yes, the what ifs. You might think that I'm being paranoid. And yes, I know I will never know if the situation doesn't present itself but I don't take baseless risks. All is calculated here in the master's mind. I tapped the side of my head in emphasis.

I took a deep breath and peeked outside my haven of a brush of plants and saw that Goku had already made it outside the castle. I frowned when I noticed the gleeful expression in his face darkened for awhile. _What could the saru be thinking_?!  I ask myself as Goku started to make his way to the direction where we last camped. But I had to wonder why his steps are so damn heavy. _Something must've upset him_. I suddenly realize.

My ears and nose steamed at the thought of the saru getting all upset. _Have I missed something in the proceedings inside Homura's dungeon_? I asked myself as I thought of all the things I did.

First I rigged Goku's chains by installing the world's littlest voltage control gadget on it. I did so by finding the exact same location outside the castle where the chains are located and threw as hard as I could the pin-like gadget on it - effectively tapping the metal of the chain from behind [1]. This would of course protect Goku from advances by the fighting god. Once the chains were touched from the perimeter outside it will release a good measure of voltage._ So that was covered, Goku's current mood had probably no connection with that._ I said to myself as I assessed that part in the proceedings.

Second, the farting noises. I had to admit that that was the easiest stunt I had pulled with Homura. And I had to thank Gojyo for that ability to make stupendous farting noises. The stupid kappa's antics had finally proven to be of use. Anyway, Goku couldn't be upset with that situation unless Homura really farted and it smelled mighty vicious. So that couldn't be it.

Third would be the green bubbles. That was by far the trickiest one. Thankfully I had perfect vision and aim so shooting the green powdered ball con soap into the pitcher was a breeze. The only real problem was the timing. That Homura is not called a god for no reason. He performs minor miracles such as calling a pitcher of water out of thin air. It is vital that once it appeared _in_ the fog the soap-ball had to be put in since it needed the time blend in with the water.

So as soon I saw that the air thickened around the table top I aimed and prayed that the area I will be aiming will be the mouth of the pitcher and not its handle. Thankfully the other gods were on my side and I shoot the heaven sent ball in. So as the fog thickened and went out the ball had already dissolved in the water without him knowing. And thankfully enough he drank it. The only snag in the plan was that I wasn't counting on Homura giving Goku some of that water.

I had to take a risk in knocking the glass out of Homura's hand. I really can't reach for my gun in the back pocket at the time so I reached for the next best possible thing. Yup, the spider. Well, duh!! The little bugger presented itself when he just appeared at my elbow!!

It's a lucky streak though. I never imagined that the fighting god was so afraid of the bug. And it didn't register to me at that time that the spider was unnaturally large, which of course was a lucky bonus. So I hit two birds with one stone. I managed to knock the glass down and managed to give Homura quite a scare. And that took up the lapse the ball-soap needed. That concoction of a ball needed to be partially digested before it starts working its charm.

The froth came at just the right moment. And damn, it almost choked him!!! If only his two sidekicks hadn't appeared on the right time. And yeah, Homura getting all tangled in his own chains is a bonus too!! It's really quite entertaining seeing Homura like a human pretzel. Made me almost feel that I'm in a circus.

Oh well, back on topic, Goku also didn't appear hurt or in pain or in whatever negative position at that particular moment. I scrunched my forehead in thought. No I never missed anything in the dungeons so…

Steam billowed once again from my ears when I realized that whatever made Goku upset was when he was getting his way out of the castle. _Could Homura one-upped me?_!! I asked myself angrily. I stood up and stretched my legs and then broke into a run to make it to the destination faster than Goku. What did you expect?! Me going back to extract revenge right away?!

Well, let's just say I'm going to give Homura a shred of doubt. I'm going to find out first if he truly is the one who hurt my Goku and if he had - then there will be hell to pay. And if he isn't then I'll just say good riddance. And besides folks, even a genius like myself needed some good ole planning to extract the perfect revenge. I could probably make up something but I really don't like taking mediocre actions.

I sped up and put all my remaining energy into running. I really need to be there before Goku or he might suspect!!!

Hakkai's POV

"Man, I can't believe the gall of Sanzo!! That buozo has certainly got the guts!!" Gojyo rambled along as we made haste towards our camping site. We didn't exactly have the luxury to hang around till Sanzo finishes with his elaborate tricks. As soon as we gathered that the green bubbles and the spider stunt would be his finale we had left the area in a jiffy.

And man, if I respected the buozo when I got to know him, now after seeing him in action I came to the conclusion that I have to revere him. Of course I know that he was cunning and he was all that equipped in the brain… But to think of him as a genius?! Nah. It never crossed my mind. And you know I have to give him the biggest credit when I fell into his artful traps.

Damn. Now that thought made me shiver again. I really have got to stop thinking about my unfortunate crossing with Sanzo's 'boundary line' on Goku. I've gotten over with the phobia, yes, but every time I had to relive that moment of torture – that moment of total helplessness, I get jumpy all over again. And I can't let that happen, I mean to be entrapped with my own demons again, because the doctor I came to see said that I may develop some sort of heart failure due to stress and over paranoia. If I did I would be a liability to this team and I can't let that happen, ever!!

"Oi, Hakkai?! Are you listening to me? I asked you if maybe we can use Hakuryu…" I heard Gojyo broke into my gloomy thoughts. I snapped up and tried to smile in vain. But because of that mighty deep thinking back there, I failed. Gojyo noticed this and frowned.

"Hey, Hakkai. Don't tell me you're thinking about your turn with Sanzo's wrath?! Please koi, stop. You wouldn't want to be…"

"Yes I know. I just can't help it after that spectacle we saw. And don't worry I'm fine now." I said in a soothing manner to alleviate Gojyo's concern.

Ah yes, Gojyo. Now he might be an insensitive jerk at times but he has all good intentions at heart. He's my own true anchor when the need calls. As long as he's there by my side assuring me that Sanzo will never lay another jealous hand on me again, I can fight the overwhelming fear and keep my phobia at the bay.

Gojyo nodded once to show that he understands and believes that I'm over reminiscing. He looked over at me thoroughly for one more time before admitting to himself that I'm going to be fine before breaking into a grin.   

"So like I asked Hakkai… Could we use Hakuryu now? My feet are getting all cramped up from all the walking." Gojyo said as he tried to smile charmingly at me. I roll my eyes._ Same ole technique_. I grumble to myself. And I have to admit even if it's the same ole trick I fall into it like every other time.

"I think so. We have a good head start with both Sanzo and Goku. I don't think they will notice." I finally said after a short deliberation with me.

"Hakuryu, ready for a drive?" I ask my loyal pet who was currently lounging on my shoulder. With a delighted chirp, he hopped off and transformed into his jeep form. Gojyo and I climbed right in. He sat on the passenger's seat since its resident 'owner' wasn't around.

"Ah. Now this is the life. Do you think Sanzo would go for the back seat?" Gojyo asked me as he stretched his legs. I looked at him with one eyebrow raised. It's like he's asking me if pigs fly. He nodded grimly getting the message.

"Yeah, I don't think so too. Just wishful thinking I guess." We didn't talk much after that. But that's okay. We're comfortable with each other just like this. There's no need for communication at certain times, we just understand and enjoy the silence. Huh? Didn't think that even the 'ero kappa' likes the quiet even every once in a while? Well, I kind of asked him about that once. I get curious too, you know. But all he said was that it was all to keep the 'image'. He might be insinuating something more or that's it but he won't elaborate. I let it drop.

"Hey where here! Good, we're the first ones to arrive." Gojyo announced as I stepped the brakes. He jumped down from the jeep to reach for his cigarettes in the back pocket. He lit it up and took a deep puff. He looked around.

"Hmm, I wonder if Sanzo and Goku would arrive together…?" He suddenly asked me.

"Well, it depends on Sanzo's reasoning."  I say.

"What do you mean?"

"If he isn't paranoid then he'd be arriving here with Goku. If he is I'll say they'd be arriving separately."

"Why do you say that?" Gojyo asks me as he threw the butt of the cigarette a long distance away.

"If he's thinking along the lines of the possibility of Goku figuring out his connection with the incident with Homura then surely he wouldn't want to be found out there. He would presumably want to outrun Goku into arriving here in our camping spot."

"And you say he'll be arriving here with Goku if he isn't paranoid, why?"

"Well, if he's confident that Goku won't be able to make the connection then what's the problem with showing up to 'rescue' him?"

"Yeah, that's plausible… Hey, wait, do you hear that?" Gojyo asks me as I notice him strain his ears. I listened cautiously for awhile before hearing the sweep of the grass and the pitter patter of footsteps, obviously at a run. After awhile the footsteps merely turned into a glide, then into a casual walk. I grinned at Gojyo.

"Looks like Sanzo's on his way."

"Yup, and from the 'hears' of it he wants to arrive with dignity." He said in a low voice, barely suppressing himself from chuckling out loud. With a look of delight in his face he raised his arms up in a wave.

"Sanzo!! You're back!! Where's the chibi saru?" Gojyo asks Sanzo who appeared at the back of a tree looking collected and dignified. Not even a strand of hair out of place. Wow. I wonder how he does it. He's like a real good actor. Sanzo huffed indignantly.

"I got there and he's already out."

"What do you mean he's already out?" I ask him, me a perfect picture of concern. I hope.

"Homura's already released him." Sanzo shortly replied.

"Huh?! Homura releasing a hostage? That's unheard of..."

"I checked the perimeter of the castle. They weren't keeping Goku in and the three were inside, meaning the Goku had escaped or he's been released." Sanzo tersely cut off Gojyo's remark. Gojyo just shrugged and I continued to opt looking worried.

"If so where is Goku? You don't suppose he lost his way?" I vaguely heard a 'shit' in Sanzo's general direction. Ooops, I didn't mean to alert him. I'm not really supposing that Goku had lost his way, I'm merely trying to keep up my role in this act. I look at Sanzo to ease his worries but I looked up at him and he looked bored and indifferent. Maybe I imagined it?

Ah, but maybe I didn't. Goku's really terrified of being alone and he might be distracted when returning here at the camp.  Sanzo knows that fact. And let's just say that the paths here looked all more or less the same for a little guy like him.

"Gojyo look for him." Sanzo suddenly ordered Gojyo as I notice that the impassive mask he usually wears has weakened down into a mildly worried look. But you really have to squint really, really hard to notice.

"What?! Do you realize how big this forest is?! And I'm searching for him alone? Why don't you go and…"

"I'm back!!" Goku announced as he appeared from a bend. We all turned to look at the source of the voice and as one we rejoiced at the sight. Let's just say that the almighty Son Goku is the baby in the group.

 "What took you so long?" Sanzo abruptly asked Goku who was currently being hugged by an overly enthusiastic Gojyo. It might not show but Gojyo treats Goku as a younger brother and he loves him dearly. Goku's brows furrowed deep in confusion when he saw the look of mild irritation on Sanzo's face.

"Huh? What do you mean Sanzo… I was captured…" He stammered as he tried to explain. How could Goku explain if he couldn't fathom the connection of Sanzo's question?

"I went in after you but you were already gone." Ah, bravo Sanzo. That really makes your excuse with us plausible. I really have to commend your cunning in justifying your lies. Not to mention that you finally made a step in the direction to reveal your true feelings to Goku.

"You went after me?" Is it just me or Goku sounded thrilled? Nah. You know me – as the emotions expert in the group, of course I would know that indeed he sounded thrilled!! It's plain knowledge that Goku is smitten with Sanzo. And predictably the only one who doesn't realize that fact is Sanzo himself. If he only knew that his jealousy is baseless.

"Of course." Sanzo said without much enthusiasm. But of course to Goku it means a lot and to show his appreciation, Goku threw himself into Sanzo's arms to give him a big hug. I think Sanzo was surprised and he was at a loss on what to do. I can see that he was torn between whacking Goku with his harisen or to return the said hug. Indecision coming into play, he decided to gently coax Goku out of the embrace.

"Wow, Sanzo I didn't know you care for me!!" Goku squealed as the harisen made its appearance. _If only Sanzo would just show his true feelings then he wouldn't need all those elaborate tricks_. I sigh to myself and briefly wondered if it's a prerequisite to have difficulty in expressing one's emotions when you want to become a monk.

"What was that for?!" Goku predictably says as he nurses his sore head. Still, he was in an ecstatic mood since Sanzo had come to save him. No amount of beating would dampen Goku's spirit after knowing that his keeper cared for him.

"Baka saru." I see we are getting back to normal as Sanzo said that signature endearment of his. I shook my head at their antics. They would really make such a cute couple should the time come. I made my way towards Hakuryu to pat its hood. It kyue'd softly.

I looked at Gojyo to find out how well he was receiving all this drama. To my surprise he has a far away look in his eyes and that his hand was absently rubbing at his chin. I knew that posture. And to anyone else who might know about this Gojyo they would be warned – because it could only mean one thing. Gojyo's in a planning state and he's serious about it. I could only conclude that he would turn the tables on Sanzo come his turn.

t.b.c

A/N:

[1] – I watched this technique in Ripley's Believe it or not. The guy, I think he was an assassin of some kind (or some other… I can't quite recall), uses needles as his weapon. In the demonstration he penetrated a very thick glass of a wall by just throwing the needles with his bare hands… It's just so cool I had to put it in!!

Reviews are much appreciated!!


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